Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

Whose shit is this

A clumsy finger in the air
illustrates her final question
as graceless thoughts
punctuate memories that fall
through her colander mind
and float off into no where
anywhere, wherever, somewhere,
someplace, everywhere,
everyplace.

Gawkily and with no filter
to capture and collate her composure
her words have no meaning
as awkward voids of nothing
posses her time and senses
sanity, right mind,wits,
good sense, wisdom, reason, understanding,
judgment are gone,
they left with some errant
young disease that slowly
captured her personality

A wet pool at her feet
means shit, nil, zilch, zip, zero
another sore, but who cares
more shit is more shit
it's not hers, not that she knows
nor cares, it's just shit.


A contest entry

Does this fit the category

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • frownsnfreckles
    May 4, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    you have captured the tragedy of this disease without any excess of sentiment or attempts to patronise. You reflect the situation in the cold twighlight of where it waits, reducing the victim to an encroaching emptiness of mind. The sadness speaks for itself, or would if it could. An excellent write Terry.


  • MysticalRayne
    December 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is very good and unfortunatly for whomever has this ailment all to true. I loved the reference to colonder mind.....


  • JustBeingDevine
    December 3, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    So Sad

    You have captured this disease well with your words. I have cared for people like this and it is very sad. Very good!


  • Knight70 silver member
    November 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    This fits the contest prompt perfectly.

    You have captured the devastating effects of Alzheimers just perfectly, in my humble opinion. I can imagine, considering your profession in the medical field, you have some first-hand experience with Alzheimers' patients. I was watching a movie the other day with my wife that is based on a Nicholas Sparks romance novel, called The Notebook. It's about a young couple who go through so much adversity in their lives, and love ends up being the bond that brings them together. It's heartbreaking to see how one of the main characters ends up getting Alzheimers later on in her life. Through all that adversity, the husband never leaves his wife's side.

    I commend you for writing about such an important topic. I can't imagine a better way to describe a "condemned mind" than what you have written here. Excellent!!!

    Don


  • Moodayo-Okohke silver member
    November 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    To dishonor those weak of mind is to dishonor ones self...Your words are true!...Most dont care and dont really see the sufferings of others...Thank you!

    BLACK CROW

    • Tercarro
      November 13, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Mnay thanks

      It is heart warming to have your support.
      Terry


  • morningstar1948 gold member
    November 9, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    A message that need to get out.

    In this world now, no one really understand why our mind leave us. they just say you need to be put in a Nut house. Some say why did you do that, couldnt you hold it.Some have irarrted bowel syndrome. some cannot remember. Some cannot see and wonder who you are. It is not their fault. But what i tell them myself is this. If this is your family " What Come around goes around" That will be you someday and walk off. I myself take care of my family and friend. I try to help them loose weight, I try to help them redain their memories. like my daddy and now my mother is going thru it. I hear my sisters screaming at my mother and I run into the house. They bossing her around. I order them out of the house and then I tell them it this the way you want your kids to treat you. I will damn make sure they do.
    But it keep going and going.
    One day soon it will be them, Let them get a taste of loneliess and being treated like a child.
    Thank you for letting me read this one.
    Good luck.
    Morningstar Sparrowhawk walk with bear

    • Tercarro
      November 13, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Thank you too

      I nursed people with such illness and would not want such things to happen to me and with that I try to understand.
      Your words are most welcome.
      Thank you so much
      Terry

1 - 8 of 8