You don’t see it
but for me, your just out of reach.
It was never meant to be like that,
being my twin sister and all.
Your about to give birth and I’m here
in my corner. Feeling so disconnected
from you and the whole experience.
You don’t hear me,
when I try to reveal what this
is like for me.
I wonder if you hear me at all
I feel to god damn trapped!
I want to tell you how I feel But I don’t
cause I know, you don’t need the stress.
I’m so tired of trying to battle
these feelings on my own.
If only you knew Sis.
How much I cry at night and let
the darkness take over me,
Sinking so low in my own misery
If only you knew!
In a list
A contest entry
- Emotion Sickness: Lost in the Currents by PerfectImperfection.
600 points, ended November 4, 2007, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Secret lies Behind the eyes by Irish-Maiden.
315 points, ended November 10, 2007, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - JUST TWO DAYS TO REACH 1000 ENTRIES !!!! ( BE A PART OF THIS RECORD BREAKING CONTEST ) by Alex Hex.
300 points, ended May 1, 2008, 526 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
-
A very strong, emotional, and touching piece. I feel for you. Don't know what issues are between you and your sister, but, hopefully, in time the two of you can reconcile. You've a caring heart to not burden her at this time. Realize, though, that both of you will be much happier together than apart. Hopefully, you can both meet halfway and share in each others lives again. That's what family is about and for.
Lovely write.
Couple comments:
Your should be You're.
The to in "I feel to" should be "too".
You may want to review punctuation as you seem to conscientously use it, but there are places that it is not present where it should be.
Not critical comments, just helpful suggestions to improve upon what I believe to be an already excellent write.
-
You are silently loving your sister from a distance and I bet at this time she needs to hear the truth from you. This is truly touching to me so yes I love it.
-
-
, she does now know how I felt 
. I needed to wait until she had the baby, cause im caring and didn't want to add more stress, lol
Thanks for reading and appreciating
Cin
-
-
I relate so much to this, and the feelings and thoughts you get out with. I too have a sister, and I love her more than anything, yet there are just some things that I can't tell her, in her happy little world.
I love the wording, and the feelings are raw yet humble. Love it!
-
-
So glad you could relate
I agree raw but humble. I felt a lot better if not to tell her, then to write the poem and get it out
Thanks for reading
Cindy
-
-
A silent love for your sister. We suffer in ourselves not letting it out, as we do not want to transfer the stress..A noble thing to do. Well written..Thanks for sharing with readers
-
-
Venugopal
Thank you. You said it perfectly. it was inappropriet for me to dump it on her, she had enough to deal with. SO a poem let me get out what I was holding in, and I felt better for it
Thank you for a lovely comment, much appreciated
-
-
A very endearing piece of thought. A loneliness amongst the feelings of separation; changes, that cannot be undone. Nicely penned. Thank you so much for your entry & Best wishes in the contest!
-
emotion
I never had a sister so don't really know what I would do...I think I would want to know how much you care...leaf
-
-
it harder then that unfortunately. Maybe soon I will tell her, now isn't a good time. I am also feeling very selfish as she has had complications with thebirth and is in theatre at the moment. So I feel very selfish. But also I know I am allowed to feel also.
Thank you for understanding as much as you can
Much appreciated
-
-
I do understand, we have to do what is right for us...I have four daughters, they have their differences...All I advise them is do what feels right, you will know when, you're the one with ALL the facts...not me...gl...leaf
-
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 11 of 11
