A wounded butterfly flutter
enter my broken window
and bled in silence
its flight began
on top the of
shaking
screaming palms
took it to a land
where the corpses of babies burned
black like dates
on sand
it flew
past a young women
falling
screaming
trying to take off
her bleeding torn socks
and lay down on night's thigh
for a moment
crying as dying
poured cold coffee
on her weeping
it flew from me
with a cloak of sadness
to cover
her naked body
a torn violin
to play slow death tunes
Author notes
Written October 13th, 2003
A contest entry
- Free Write !!! by Frozen Fears.
275 points, ended October 17, 2003, 33 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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i agree with the critiques...this is a highly styalized piece. freeverse poetry should be so beautiful because the ideal is to speak from the heart, without impending verse or rhyme. unfortunately, there is alot of bad free verse. here, however you reach the ideal of free verse. very good. this poem would be lovely in arabic
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Amazing.. like walking over shattered glass in rain..i like it!
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thanks Danna
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...as the one winged butterfly
endeavors to take flight
the blue bleeds from the sky
leaving it a ghostly white.
Your imagery is powerful and sharp, Mona. I love your style. Always leaves me with a vivid picture in my head.
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Thanks rosebud
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it flew from me//
with a cloak of sadness //
to cover//
her naked body//
a torn violin//
to play slow death tunes //
especially the last stanza....wonderful write... -
Myra thanks The butterfly was flying in Iraq seeying all kind of chaos telling sad stories
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It is like seeing the stillborn taken away from the mother; the mother becoming the Earth, mourning her dead children - this wounded butterfly; the broken window; the torn violin ... all added up to compose an astonishing poem about mortality and the fragile man.
A psychological shock, yes: how sadly beautiful a dying butterfly ...
Love.
Myra
Edited on Oct 18, 8:18 because ''. -
thanks Frozen Fears i am glad ya liked it
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God... im shocked.. I really liked this alot.. you have me speechless..
. this.. this was astounding.. i like this alot.. Good luck..
~*~Frozen~*~Fears~*~
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