Such a troubling matter,
swells within my chest;
distance shatters dreams
and Stars collapse with time.
All that once was shining-
compelled throughout the night
to fall, to fade, to cross the lake
within the oaken box;
gently drifting, cloaked by mist
concealed by Night,
love takes its flight.
Author notes
sigh.
A contest entry
- Enter All Your Love Writes Here! by xxRainbowDawnxx.
300 points, ended March 8, 2008, 306 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Love is sad when it goes. I am sorry it left you, I hope it finds you again soon. I know love is a rocky ride for sure!
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wow, this is exceptionally gentle, like a lullaby.
the whole plot kind of reminds me of romeo and juliet. the beginning starts with the whole "troubling matter" and more of a sad theme, almost like regret. then the end mentions love, which i think is when the person accepts their feelings and gives into love.
thats just my interpretation ^.^
great write!
LXF
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Hoodwinked
This is exquisitely beautiful. It is so softly spoken like a shooting star. -
Hood-Winked!
gently drifting, cloaked by mist
concealed by Night,
love takes its flight.
I liked how this was written and how it made me picture what it was written. Good job my friend.
...Simply Me♥
P.S you have been hood-winked by the proud members of the Poetic Bandits. -
Hood-Winked! this is filled with such a deep sadness. It fills my soul with almost an empty feeling. Well written, it captures the readers attention and holds it. Nice use of vocabulary.
hood-winked by a proud member of The Poetic Bandits
it means you have been nominated by someone in the group to be read. Not tricked in any way.
-
Hood-Winked!
Such a rich sad write, full of imagery...your word flow is engaging, placed just so the reader is left in awe...an absolute must to be bookmarked, to re-visit again and again
You have been hood-winked by a proud member of The Poetic Bandits
Love and smiles ~Lilac
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HOODWINKED !!!
SilverInk,
I have to agree with the others, this Is a wonderful poem, rich with imagery and deep meaning. You certainly have a way with words and you use them very effectively. Well Done!
You have been Hoodwinked by the Poetic Bandits today because We Care!
Dennis
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You've been Hoodwinked!
This is an AMAZING poem! Wow, I think I'll have to go through your poetry, I'm impressed. I particularly like "and Stars collapse with time.", that line really stuck with me. I hope you enjoy your day being Hoodwinked!
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Oh my... I see you have improved your writing style a lot since 2005... this poem is simply breathtaking!.. I read that you are inspired by Edgar Allen Poe - you couldn't have chosen a better style (hehe, in my opinion) and you do it well... I just can't praise this piece enough... it is amazing!
Never stop writing
Polly
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Bandits United
gently drifting, cloaked by mist
concealed by Night,
love takes its flight.
Great ending to this verse
Well said
Rick
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