My duty was abandoned,
for naught but lust's longing;
penitent, broken and bowed,
a pyre eagerly awaits the crime,
to burn away my grievous sin.
The King ebbs towards death’s grip,
as surely as a death blow
in midst of glorious battle,
though the sword brandished,
was but a strike from my heart.
As his glory slowly withers,
the land, the people are diminished;
pestilence, death, evil openly creeps,
vulnerable, the dragon slumbers,
with sword of legend sheathed and forgotten.
This has been my folly, my doing,
the pressure of position and obligation
laid heavily upon my young shoulders,
my heart without warning turned
to the soul of another.
Or so it was that I thought,
little knowing that my heart
felt not love, but a lust,
a lust free from responsibility,
that returned to me my youth.
For this, the Round Table is broken,
the life of my true love fades, shattered;
I have taken the chastity and honor,
of the most noble of Lords
And made our champion an enemy.
Without the protection of such warriors,
true enemies now gather tenfold,
howling and braying, guttural and vulgar,
like the wild beasts of hell’s plains,
at the very doors of Camelot.
I accept now, my ignominious fate,
for all these evils are my seed;
will legend eternally tell
of the flame-consumed harlot,
or the beauty, the glory of the once Queen?
Author notes
For picture prompt:
http://jesiel.deviantart.com/art/Arkhee-The-dark-age-is-coming-4258307
A few notes. The title "The White Phantom" comes from the subject of the piece, Guinevere of Arthurian legend. The name is a derivative of the Welsh "Gwenhwyfar", which means, amongst other things, "White Phantom".
The picture prompt spoke to me very clearly of this. In Thomas Malory's "Le Morte D'Arthur" and other versions of Arthurian legend, after the uncovering of her affair with Lancelot, the King sentences Guinevere to death by burning at the stake. This picture reminded me greatly of that, thus this piece is Guinevere on her last journey, musing on all that she has done.
The film 'Excalibur' also stands as an inspiration for this piece, which is also based on "Le Morte D'Arthur", though a lot of it is changed, in particular Guinevere's death sentence. If my memory serves correctly, in "Le Morte D'Arthur", Arthur grants Guinevere a repreave from the fires of the stake, though my memory is misty on that, so if I am incorrect, I am sure someone will correct me.
*Update* On re-reading this, perhaps writing this (for personal reasons) was maybe not the greatest of ideas. However, I shall leave it here, as is.
In a list
A contest entry
- Pic Prompts!!! by takemypainaway.
450 points, ended October 31, 2007, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - My Contest Cherry! by harajukuprincess.
300 points, ended November 5, 2007, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Arthurian Legend by Rinoasis.
450 points, ended February 23, 2008, 6 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Peer Pressure (Vote) - 3 (last, if nobody shows interest) by xxRainbowDawnxx.
450 points, ended April 2, 2008, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Open to Allpoetry #129 Poems on Arthurian Legend by Lyndon.
6000 points, ended November 7, 2008, 10 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 34 of 34
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Thank-you for a very strong entry
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Thank you most kindly.
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great read! NANGALEEMA
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very nice
as one with a lifelong arthurian passion, i liked this very much. keep up the good work.
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Very god poem, I really liked it.
see you around
zarokk666
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Thank you very kindly.
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This was a really interesting read.. I really enjoyed reading it.. Your words created a really good image..
Great write..
Peace to you,
Jetleena
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Thank you most kindly.
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I love the aura of this poem, the sense of doom it portrays, not only for the speaker, but for the entire realm. Also, the ending, which to me suggests that even in her final hours, the "selfish" part of her wonders how she will be remembered. Excellent work, poet.
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Thank you very much. I liked that idea, that even facing impending death, her thoughts still turn to her own fame and standing.
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This is amazingly written.
I love the dark ages and legends and you truly did it justice with this piece.
I absolutely love how this is written from Gwenivere's perspective and the pain and regret that comes across in the wording.
Beautiful, absolutely beautiful!!!
Good luck in the contest!!!
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Thank you very much. It is a subject matter I had been wanting to touch upon for a while, but never got around to it until I seen the opportunity through a contest prompt.
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You pulled off that "old feel" brillaintly. What a creative, interesting gripping tale....Told with excellence....pulling the reader in from start to finish. Absolutly fantastic!
....seriously....I doubt I would have even entered this contest had I scoped out the competition first! lol....I would say good luck, but clearly luck is not needed! GREAT write!
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Thank you very much. The old feel is what I was really going for most within the piece.
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Very interseting and great read, good luck int the contest.
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Thank you very much, glad you enjoyed it.
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Bravo, never have I heard the legend of Arthur put in such a way. I find this poem so good because you took a very well known story and told it in such a way that it became new and exciting. Very well done. Great job and good luck.
Hugs and kisses,
tiphanie*** -
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Thank you very much. It was good to write as it gave me that opportunity to look at it from a different point of view.
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Thank you for the authors notes. I was wondering where the name of the poem came in. lol I thought that this was beautifully written and the wording was amazing. (My adj. are bad when I comment sorry... I over use things lol) Well, luckily for you I have nothing to say to fix the poem. I think you will do well in this contest. I'm going to book mark this poem so that I do not forget it.
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Thanks, I know what you mean about commenting, I do it all the time myself.
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Very nice I love your wording in this poem Good luck with it in the contest Hope you get lots of votes.
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Thank you very much.
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Wow a wonderful tale told here. Like the dark undertones you have given it. All the best in the contest with it
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Thank you very kindly. I was hoping to give the piece a sense of dark desperation to it, along with the resigned realisation of the mistakes made.
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This was nice piece. I loved the way you cold immerse yourself in the story and wite it with such commitment to the language and still make it able for me to understand. It feels very ancient. thanks for entering! ~~Hara
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Thank you very much. When I write pieces like this that deal with an old historical or mythological subject, I try to write it in such a way that it has an old feel, without overdoing the "ye olde worlde" language (mainly because I can't do that part), but yeah, you're right, overdoing it can make it very hard for the reader to understand.
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excellent write
You are actually an excellent writer. A captivating story...& BTW read some of Zecharia Sitchin.. You may be amazed
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Thank you very much. I haven't gotten around to reading any Sitchin at all yet, I always mean to start reading some of his work, along with Lawrence Gardner, but time, money and distractions keep getting in the way.
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nice work good luck
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Thank you. It was a good picture.
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I think this was great! While I was reading through, I realized that I had written a poem just last night almost similar to this, but in a different context and from a different perspective, disregarding the picture. But I checked the picture, and it stemmed from great inspiration and you really did a wonderful take on this with your imagery and brilliance. Good job!
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Thank you very much. It pretty much hit me right away what I was going to write when I saw it. I have had it in mind to do a King Arthur/Arthurian piece for a while, but not on that particular part of the story, plus it was no doubt going to be long and I already have two epics on the back burner I need to sit down and finish first.
Have you posted your piece up yet?
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I like this poem very much, I'm glad you desided to leave it!! Best of luck.
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Thank you very much. It was a great pic for inspiration.
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