Lost in this crowd
in between them all
there's no lost and found
when you're alone to fall
no hope in sight
no way of escaping
no air, no light
no one is helping
Buried underneath this crowd
feet trample over me
so many of them, like clouds
they don't realize or see
I plead for their aide
they continue as if blind
time seems to slowly fade
and I lay below, behind
Enough, this is it
I push through, arise
all their eyes are lit
it's me, I'm here, surprise
Author notes
yep, society swallows up the best of us.
- Get Read group list • next in list
A contest entry
- Prompt by 2lullabyhaven.
450 points, ended November 13, 2007, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
emotional much?
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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I think you did very well with the rhyme, which I think is hard to do well. I especially liked these parts.
no hope in sight
no way of escaping
no air, no light
no one is helping
Buried underneath this crowd
feet trample over me
so many of them, like clouds
they don't realize or see
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Ha ha, good ending.
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thanks. =DD
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A great piece, I loved this in its entirity, great! Best of luck in the contest
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thank you very much.
I really appreciate your kind words. =)
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Wow, this is cute, thanks for your entry into my contest...I like your last line the most lol
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thank you so much.
and I liked this prompt a lot..~~ =D
[bows]
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A great piece, I loved the last verse, great! Best of luck in the contest!
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aww, ^//^
thank you, I need it.
there's too many amazing writers around..hahah
I did get one trophy though. I'm so happy...=D
thank you, as always, for commenting.
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