Gave you my heart,
Then you torn it apart.
You misused my trust,
And turned away with disgust.
I felt my heart break,
Into a million peices.
Sorrow and pain,
Never decreases.
Gave it away,
My very soul.
And then crawled into,
That really black hole.
Please give it back,
My heart I mean.
Why did your eyes,
Be so keen?
Give it back,
I saw through your act.
Never knew your love,
Would have so much impact.
I never knew that love,
Can ever be so hard.
But the scenes I saw walking,
On Heart Break Boulevard.
Give me my heart,
It isn't your possession.
It's not even in your,
Ever so lonely section.
Heart Break Boulevard.
Oh what a laugh.
Give me a candy,
And I'll give you a bath.
Naked eyes saw through my cloths,
As I sat there all alone.
My eyes of sorrow showed it all,
Have lost the way, where I belong?
Author notes
So you know XD the cloths part, was not about you know... that thing.
A contest entry
- Love, Tears, and Darkness by Poet-of-the-shadows.
550 points, ended October 29, 2007, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - His words are like poison but his lies make you smile by edit my world..
425 points, ended December 15, 2007, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Was there any meaning to this poem in your eyes?
Comments
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hmm...I like the emotion behind the piece but the flow is off and there are a great deal of grammatical and spelling errors here. The main thing that takes away from the piece is the flow. Perhaps if you didn't make it rhyme...the shape of the poetry seemed force. It is however a very powerful piece, if perhaps you were to just edit it a bit more it could be incredible.
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Grammer errors are what makes a poem a poem. It can be different and the grammer can be off. But the spelling errors I hardly even care for. Sorry.
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so sad , i feel your pain. please continue to write and good luck
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