Give me thorns
Wilting leaves
Even insects. .
But not silk or paper
Let me smell . .
The perfume from . .
A sun filled garden
As the bees buzz
Through my window
I don’t wish to live
In a manmade
Artificial world
Real Nature
is my true
Habitat
A contest entry
- Nature PIF by CarolDesjarlais.
625 points, ended October 23, 2007, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Keep this poem
for the Nature theme in late May for our anthology, "On Viewless Wings". Ron.
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This is beautiful in it's literal form, but there is also a metaphor here - about people being real. I don't know if you intended it to have a double meaning, but it works very well. Yes, many people are the product of a man-made, artificial world.
I love this!
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Amen to that! I love all that is natural, of nature, of our Creator. Powerful write!--And, yes, I'm back at the grinding stone of life and am excited to get back into my writing and the other joys in my life. We live and learn. I've decided to leave crumbs along the way so I can find my way back if need ever be again. Enjoy seeing you again. Still traveling? Enjoy life, Albert! You've worked hard, lived well and are truly deserving. Sending you warm thoughts and prayers, Friend! Be blessed! And fill me in on your life. Been awhile, hasn't it? Love to you and yours, Albert.--Kel (Presently writing my first fantasy and am loving the leaps my imagination can take for this book! Wonderful fun!)
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this i think is beautiful. i love flowers!
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I agree with you wholeheartedly. Why do some feel as though artificial perfection if preferable to the real beauty with its imperfections and all? I really like this poem. great job.
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Nature -- the real thing
I can feel the joy in this poem.
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Hope you win this contest my fellow poet you are truely gifted with the pen and I relly enjoyed reading this.You must have been writng for a long time it shows in this masterpiece.I look forward in the future to reading more of your work.
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Oh yes, I totally agree....there is a discordant capitalization scheme going on ehre that stopped my reading...as well, coudl you check this phrase?
"When nature
is replace
By silk roses
" -
Wonderful
A couple of misspellings, 1st stanza, should replace be replaced? and in the 2nd what did you mean even "insets". Other than that this was truly wonderful.
Anna -
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Thank you . .
Sorry that shold have been insects . .
I was too tired to be typing . . which is often the case . .
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lovely...hidden truths within it too
seems like commercialism tries to strip too much away
from us, remember the taste of real butter, the taste
of real cream, some don't even remember. It's coolwhip
and margarine, hydrogenated oils-yuck!
Well written poetically clear clean write. Charming
beauty in this.
ears2hearyou
Kathleen : ))
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Thank you . . and I agree . .
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