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Intimacy of the Sea

dancing freely
upon the ripples of
crystal blue water

softness of the wind
strokes bare flesh
like a gentle caress

moonlight

incandesence
glistening off us

sea of stars
shining against
the velvet sky

tonight we share
our love affair
by diving into

...the intimacy of the sea

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • WTF-Hatchwork silver member
    November 29, 2007
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    cool

    good stuff

  • Mykeee silver member
    October 31, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Lovely view of the sea and
    what intimacies it brings
    into lovers eyes. Great
    metaphors as well ~ Mykey


  • penman gold member
    October 22, 2007
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    Wonderful

    Very sensual and passionate. Truly captures the picture so well. Intimacy as one should know.


  • Suzanne Dia silver member
    October 22, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    i really really like this, but the last line almost feels too explanatory. I'd cut it at diving in

    Just a thought, though.

    Warm imagery, makes me want to go swimming.


  • delightfulmess
    October 21, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Oh this was stunning. Love this take on that
    pic... Thank you so much for entering the contest


    delila

  • Dobar Dan
    October 20, 2007

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    great poetry

    The rhyme and flow are beautiful as is the story - lovely - you pen a pretty nice moving picture here - keep on keeping on - Bless God - Joe


  • SmokinHotWhiteTiger gold member
    October 20, 2007

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    Quite Lovly

    Well this certainly made the picture come alive and so much more. I admire your talent with this beautiful depth and flow through out it. I also admire how you deiced to write this piece with so few of words and crystal clearing wording at that. any ways all round an awesome poem and a very enjoyable one at that. keep up the good work as always and Good Luck in the contest. Signed, Paul


  • Touchof1der gold member
    October 20, 2007

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    You have such an "easy" way with words, so gentle and tender and yet very meaningful. Brings a smile to my face and warmth to my heart. Thank you for sharing your words with me and best wishes to you in the contest. Keep that quill dipped in ink and ever ready for use.
    ♥ Touchof1der


  • Jeremy0826 gold member
    October 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Simply beautiful my friend! I love the setting and picture that you used for this poem. Such a sweet and tranquil piece you have written. Well done and good luck to you in the contest! Keep up the wonderful work here!




    Jeremy0826
1 - 9 of 9