I lay underneath the willow’s tear
Sky unbound above
My dog sleeps near
there’s naught to hear
and at last I know true love
For all a man needs is
a dog and some trees
to be content for the years to come
A contest entry
- The Ultimate Sophistication by autarky.
700 points, ended November 30, 2007, 15 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Be critical in your review, I want to get better and any advice will help
Comments
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cool........short,sweet,simple,yet profound........just the way i like them!no wonder u won the contest.......congrats.
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This was a beautiful and perfectly simplistic write. I'm impressed. The flow was also excellent, though it's a little broken in the last line of each stanza. I love this.
Breathtaking! -
I love the simplicity in this... the message and the length go together really well. I think the only thing that was a little off was the flow, it was kinda choppy. Other than that this was a well written piece.
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