I look into the mirror
and I see myself dissected
the hollow person behind the lie
plagued by tears and torment
and the face that always smiles
to show the world that I am normal
The pain that I hide so well
even from my closest friends
is like a cheese grater against my skin
constantly ripping at the seams
trying to reveal itself
I keep pushing, pushing it down
refusing to let my vulnerability show
the means to an end to protect myself
from being victim to the same old perversion
that seems to stalk me from the shadows
My mind in cartwheels trying to conceal
all the abhorrent memories
that keep clouding my waking hours
and constantly invading my dreams
Here you are, so surprisingly
seeing for the first time
what none other than my trusted mirror
have ever seen, the real identity
of the chaotic soul
that remains hidden to the rest of the world
behind a calm and casual facade.
Author notes
written based on the image prompt. Image credit: "The Mask" by FrameFrozen
written about the Bi-polar disorder that the woman I am carer for suffers and how she "puts on another face for the rest of the world" to hide the one that shows her fears.
"my secrets" - as per requirement for most recent contest.
A contest entry
- Two Faced But In A Different Head Space by Girl With Guitar.
700 points, ended November 24, 2007, 26 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Secret lies Behind the eyes by Irish-Maiden.
315 points, ended November 10, 2007, 10 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Condemned Minds by Acidanthra.
600 points, ended October 29, 2007, 16 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Detailed critique welcome
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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thanks for doing putting that... (i know i'm strict)
anyways this piece is amazing and exactly what i'm looking for, it was something i can relate to and the picture to go with it is perfect it adds to the poem well some pictures takes away from the poem... (if that makes sense... ) You really gave out and got exactly what i meant amazing job...
Good luck in my contest...
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"is like a cheese grater against my skin"
I'm not entirely sure of that line but hey, I DO understand what you're getting at with it.
I think that the way this is written suits the idea behind it and I love your overall message so welcome to the Finalists List.
♥
Bandaid. -
This is so vivid!!! I too feel what you have described. I call my facade "formal normal". This is such an excellent write. Good luck in this contest.
Lady D
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I like how you put yourself within the write,
and the creativity of thought wonderful job once again
Scott, Thanks for sharing,
Love and Light
Frozentearz -
I found this write to be amazing. You have put yourself in the mind and body of a 'victim' whether self inflicted or not and drawn out the feelings inside.
I found this a very strong write and worthy of the picture prompt.
All the best in the contest.
Sue
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Thanks for the compliment, I was able to put myself in the mind of the 'victim' so easily as being carer for a woman with bi-polar disorder, I see her wear her mask every day, especially when meeting someone for the first time, fearing they may judge her for what was inflicted upon her.
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wow very in depth emotion filled write, good luck in contest
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WOW OMgosh this is really amazing, and stunning, you have done a fantastic take on this prompt, sent chills down my spine with your EXCELLENT imagery and poem, I am so amazed at the depth of this, your flow was awesome and the entire poem just WOW I am at a loss for words with this one, LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT!!!!!! best to you in this contest! ~blessings~
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Thank you for such an overwhelmingly wonderful comment, so pleased you enjoyed it and felt the emotion of the poem's meaning. It is always good to know a poem's point is understood and appreciated. Thanks again for the affirmation.
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