I think rocks
would be sharper
on bare skin,
and branches
don’t leave
uncovered
toes alone
even when
they’re young.
I wonder if
goose bumps
and sunburn
were invented
with childbirth,
and how gray
the world was
when nothing was named
and nothing
tasted.
From this side
of the fruit,
I can only
think.
Author notes
So it's a little late for me to be writing poetry lol. Tell me what you think and be honest, please - I always love a good critique. Toasted with jam. Bittersweet jam. Mmm...
A contest entry
- Delightful Quickie (PIF optional) by delightfulmess.
875 points, ended October 16, 2007, 7 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Speak your mind.
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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I was telling my Sunday School class about Eden last week! This really made me think. I like how you shaped your poem, too. Yes, we can only think from this side of the fruit, but one day, we won't. Thank you for commenting on my piece. I appreciate it!
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From this side of the apple? Interesting. Sort of reminds me of a song by Pink Floyd. I'm not really familiar with it, but it was about the dark side of the moon. This is sort of the same thing, isn't it? Very interesting.
Congrats on your trophy. -
beautiful! damn worthy piece! love the flow and the way the piece is formatted!
lovely indeed!
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Thank you for sharing, delighted in this, congrats to you on the gold
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oh - this is excellent poetry! COngrats to you on the gold...
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I agree with Dee
very thought provoking.
Well done, like sun burnt breasts
Buddy
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Oh my goodness. this is a very deep take on that pic.
I really enjoyed this. Thank you for entering the contest
delila
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The picture was very inspiring...I'm not sure I expected it to take me in the direction it did lol. Thanks for sharing and for hosting!
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