"Meet me at the river,
there our hands will be clean"
The last words ever spoken to me.
I went out to meet you,
but "hello" never came...
Love lost in dire the down pour of rain.
You waited, You wanted,
You thought to seek,
But you remaind there waiting for me at the creek.
The screeching of tires,
as the car skid to a halt.
They say that alcohol was at fault.
Im gone, not scared.
I just want you to know.
That I miss you terribly, I didn't want to go.
So on nights when you're lonley,
Give yourself to the rain...
I'll be there in the down pour whispering your name.
Author notes
Option 2
SN venomX
A contest entry
- 4:44 - a n y t h i n g by the chase.
900 points, ended October 26, 2007, 45 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Break my heart. by black-angelwings-.
300 points, ended November 4, 2007, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - TONS OF OPTIONS/prewrites/whatever..... by landmark.
450 points, ended November 4, 2007, 36 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Sadness in The Heart of The Heart by Cari Cullen.
300 points, ended October 22, 2007, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Contest For Everyone.. Take a look (options) by TheAshtrayGirl.
550 points, ended October 27, 2007, 53 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Contest for Widows & Widowers, and Beyond by MassMan.
950 points, ended November 12, 2007, 5 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The Best Ever: For REAL poets ONLY by TheLostGirl.
450 points, ended November 10, 2007, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - 3 Options by With Broken Wings.
375 points, ended November 4, 2007, 38 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Your Best poem! by jewlinz.
460 points, ended November 7, 2007, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - yep yep yep....*bunny* by kitkat92.
450 points, ended November 10, 2007, 24 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pain. by forbidden-colour.
300 points, ended November 13, 2007, 39 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - My Favorite Sad,Love,Depressing,Hearfelt by Shannon62875.
375 points, ended December 11, 2007, 32 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Help me get through the rain by Jessi-As-Always.
875 points, ended February 23, 2008, 50 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Break My Heart by Jocilynn Destroyed.
600 points, ended April 25, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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i think i like this, even tho i entered too, i honestly want you to win
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soo beautiful! ♥
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aww
wow this is really good!!! You did a great job.. was this a true story??~?~?~?~? wow it was really good.. keep upt he great work and good luck in my contest
Shannon*Leah
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Good rhythm, no forced rhyme, brilliant story
Thank you for entering,
x -
Wow this is beautiful. I enjoyed the way its set up, it looks nice.
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good
very nice ending and well writen, thanx for entering -
Interesting and chilling. Written from a different perspective.
Thanks for your entry.
Davi
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This is a beautiful poem of love lost. Good narration and conclusion. Well Done
Dennis
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I am a tad bit confuzzled why did who ever kill this person? also why did they kill this person? I am only asking because I think it might give me a better sence of understanding to the motivation behind this piece. all together a good write very good write
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:)
Amazing
Such a beautiful poem
Sweet yet sad and the emotion come across well
Good luck in my contest
From Jaz <3 -
what a gorgeous line...
"I'll be there in the down pour whispering your name." -
OOPS CARRIED AWAY
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THIS IS WELL DONE. FULL OF EXPRESSION. I THINK ITS PERFECT THE WAY IT IS.
TELL YOU WHAT YOU DONT WIN GOLD ON THIS, SEND ME THE LINK AND LET ME KNOW I PUT THIS HERE...I WILL SNED YOU THE GOLD POINTS ON THIS ONE.
I WAS HUMMING THROUGH THE SORROW AND PAIN OF THIS...SEEMS LIKE A SONG IF ADDED A FEW MORE LINES.
GREAT JOB.
REMIND ME OF YOU DO NOT WIN GOLD, I WILL GIVE YOU 300POINTS ITS WORTH IT
PASSIONS -
Hmm, this is good, hmmm can you go a little deeper? I'm not assking for much.........if this is personal or too personal sorry! But I think you can give me one more good poem of yours and does not have to be a death. But I like this poem alot I just want to see a little more out of you.Now I umderstand that if that happen your all shaken up but come on give me you plaease?
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Honestly this was a nice poem and I liked it,BUT it was "love" and I am not accpeting love poems.
....Simply Me♥
P.S message me for anything. -
I don't rememebr who said it but they say something like when rain falls it's Angels crying tears well done and many blessings always xxx
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This seriously gave me chills. I still have them as I type this. Beautiful.
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