FIrst of all I just want to say thank you
You didn't have to wait for me... but you did and I'm grateful
You didn't have to stay single... but you did, so I'm faithful
You sacrificed the condition of your heart, to ensure the health of mine
Even though you had feelings for me, you knew you couldn't resign
Thank you for that first kiss, that made me realize
That my biggest source of happiness, resides within your eyes
You even gave to me your innocence, when I didn't deserve your trust
You showed me that sex can be, more than out of lust
And still today you keep me happy, your smile releaves my stress
The only one who cheers me up, with easily found success
So in return I give to you all that I possess
And even if you anger me, I'll love you nonetheless
When I think about the things you've done to bring our hearts togther
I think of ways to srtenghthen us, and make you smile forever
I'll love you till your hair turns grey, and we both have use for walkers
I live right now to cherish the day, you meet me at the alter
Your efforts have not been in vain, I promise you'll be reimbursed
With every single ounce of love, my heart will let me disperse
I know you feel I owe you not, and I guess I can agree
But still I feel the will to repay you, with love unconditionally
In a list
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 22 of 22
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wow i loved this poem, its got so much love in it i love the rythum, i like
Thank you for that first kiss, that made me realize
That my biggest source of happiness, resides within your eyes
this is my favirout part,
you have a wonderful way with words and i like the style that you put this poem in it is really heart felt and emotive
well done a beautiful write
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This is a beautifully heartfelt piece
I really enjoyed the rhythm and the flow and the words are sweet... especially the last two lines in places the rhyme seems a little forced, but that is up to experience I think... wonderful
Keep writing
Polly -
Wow, that's very very deep. This flows so easily and catches attention from the very first stanza. There's raw, heartfelt emotion let out in this, and it ends beautifully. Well done!
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I like it.
true love very well put.
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I'm In Love
This is a beautiful proclamation of love, true love. I love the way the words flow together, but don't sound forced. It's purely emotion, without the clouds of difficulty. You inspire love within the reader with your words. Thank you. -
WOW... this was really great! I love this part:
"I know you feel I owe you not, and I guess I can agree
But still I feel the will to repay you, with love unconditionally" Great job!
~rocklover -
Awww this is truly beautiful and really heartfelt. You both are lucky to have eachother, she to have a husband to love's her so and you to have a wife who's willing to stand by you. It's not often that you see a guy stand up and acknowledge the woman by his side or even admit that he has a wonderful woman in his life...so I applaud you sir and wish you all the best!
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God's Heart
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Love can be wonderful. But only love for what you feel within your soul and heart. Not what you feel you owe someone..well said..thanks for sharing
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What a great write. This poem scans perfectly, without feeling forced. The rhymes are clean. The grammar is straightforward and conversational. And all of that comes together to put forward a powerful message. All in all this made for a great read. I hope you keep writing such powerful poetry, and I look forward to reaading more from you. Excellent work.
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AWWWWW......... that is sooo sweet. I serious really great job. I can feel the love in this poem and the flow is great. It reminds me a lot of me and my boyfriend and I am totally going to read it to him. Anyway, GREAT job and keep writing.
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I love this. What a nice love poem. Thank you for sharing a piece of your heart here on allpoetry. Blessed Be!
~~S & M~~ -
Amazing
this is a good honest sounding poem and written very well
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This is very sweet. I liked it. It's a nice, warm, loving piece and the flow is great.
Nice one
[x] -
Good Write
I really enjoyed this. It seems very honest.
I do have one suggestion. The line "You showed me that sex can be, more than out of lust" I'd change that to showed me that sex can be, more than just lust. I think that flows better. But overall, good write!
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Great rhyme and flow. I enjoyed the read very much. One thing, your alter, should be altar. Other than that, greata write.
Kelli -
Love unconditionally is really a wonderful way to pay back someone. I think that's the best gift of all to give them
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This was a very interesting write to me. You captured a true, innocent account of two who will trust one another and be faithful, something not often seen in our times. There is a depth of emotion here that makes the words truly heartfelt. Other than two spelling errors, relieves, instead of releaves, and altar instead of alter, you wrote well. Spelling and grammar are very easy to fix, but the body of feeling is there. Nice job!!
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Wow, this was sooooooooooo NICE, man. And I'm sure that's all she really wants. Most girls do. Wow, I was diggin' this piece. It just flows and the rhyme is on rhythm. I LOVED this. I'll have to keep up with your work. Check me out sometime. Later. - cgirl0410
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That's what's up, although you spelled alt'e'r wrong it's ALTAR. But other that, this is another peice of work I wish I could've come up with. Good work, keep writin.
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I know you feel I owe you not, and I guess I can agree
But still I feel the will to repay you, with love unconditionally
Well this is a melody of love and the music of life here..well done..a heartfelt and touching sentimets here..well done..and thanks for the poem for my contest...
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awww babi this is great....and i kno i didnt have to do those things but i wanted to...i love you and thats why i did all that...i love this i hope u do well in the contest also.... i love you *mwah*
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Emotions......wow.....This is a heartfelt poem for real. You've come a long way, but ya'll have my support. *snaps* Cause your style is starting to change.
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