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Echoes

After your death, a hard Spring rain
drenches the woods and last year’s leaves
And as the skies empty, I stand alone
in its coursing stream, mute,
shocked, near lifeless as the trees.

And I strain to hear you call my name
in a symphony of clear liquid notes
dripping from the spouts and eaves
and greet again your light footfall
by the silent, unlatched gate.

And I know,  if I am not the one to listen,
who will chance to hear you?
Will there only be the morning doves
breathing out my sorrow
in their gentle question...Who?

-df-

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 5 of 5

  • Jalalbad gold member
    November 5, 2007
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    this is excellent but some sad. Good luck in contest

  • allena1966
    November 2, 2007

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    And I know, if I am not the one to listen,
    who will chance to hear you?

    This IS good. I feel the loneliness and the way
    the rain would make you shiver. Good work.


  • Pamela A Lamppa silver member
    October 15, 2007

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    As I indulge myself for the third time reading this beautiful piece, I am quite moved by the effortless flow and soft rhythm that pulls your gentle rhymes into being. Even the sound of the dove questions the loss and the sorrow laced within the missing of one held dear.

    This piece goes beyond form and pattern and brings the reader to a gentle place. A time we all could face and live within.

    A beautiful poem. Thank you for posting this treasure. I am so grateful to have it in this contest for all to read and enjoy.

    Best of luck in the judging. Truly and impressive work. ~Pamela

  • Yvette Champ gold member
    October 15, 2007
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    The title is a perfect introduction,I like the way it is part and parcel of the poem.The rhyme is faultless within it's flow,completely uncompramized and rhyme like this is a pleasure to read.You met the mandate of the contest seemingly effortlessly,imbuing your piece with the imagery of rain and the emotion of tears but with your own voice.Kudos.


  • Blue Rew silver member
    October 15, 2007

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    This is touching with a depth all it's own.
    I felt it strongly relates to it's wonderful title.
    Very powerful display of sentiment and thought. Blue

1 - 5 of 5