Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

The answer within

In this day and age in society
with so much lack of sobriety
Everything done in opulence
while not always applying pertinence

Day by day there's still fighting of old
while more and more individual emotions grow cold
Why can't we see the goodness inside
How can we make all this fighting subside

Wars aren’t made by only fighting entirely
Wars are also made by division in society
Come now and listen here to my plea
What matters is not blood thirst
It is what’s in you and in me

Let us rid ourselves of this growing cancer
Take in the harmony, colours and hues
War is not the answer
The answer is within you.

Author notes

Himler

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 10 of 10

  • aboomer silver member
    January 25, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    First off....congrats. on the well deserved Gold (and the Bronze, also)!!
    I really like this. Great wording full of deep truths and reads nicely. I like all of the wording in this!
    Very, very well done.


    • Tristan Storm
      January 26, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks my darling! ~ Yes, I unfortunately have been very absent from AP for a while, work is keeping me really busy, and in the prosess I had to cancel 2 of my contests because of it.

      It is sad and I feel so sorry for having to have done this but I barely get a chance do do anything these days.

      I hope life in the new year has been treating you better.

      Hope to hear from you again soon.

      Hugz
      Himler


  • leander Moderators member
    December 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I think you've got a pretty good poem written here I really like the imagery you have managed to capture within the words, well done on that

    the rhymescheme isn't consistent though - not that it's bad, but I wonder why you changed the format in last stanza, and actually, the fourth line of third stanza breaks the rhyming too...

    Anyway, you still did an outstanding job on this one

    Thank you for entering the contest, I wish you the best of luck!
    Leander


  • pearl-dragon
    November 22, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Congratulations on your Gold trophy. I thought your poem was amazing. You said it all...the answer is within you.

    Margaret


  • TwilightDazzles
    November 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is awesome with such a powerful message attached. I love the rhyme, I love everything! Thank you for your entry and following the rules Best wishes


    • Tristan Storm
      November 21, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you so much or your wonderful comment and the Bronze trophy! It is a real honor.

      Hugz
      Himler


  • Knight70 silver member
    November 17, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    truly an exquisite piece....

    This is so heart-felt and genuine. I haven't read the other entries in the contest you entered this in, but I think you have penned a gold here. Bravo!! Don

    • Tristan Storm
      November 17, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you again! This is probably one of my personal favorite poems. It took me forever to write something to go with the given prompt but in the end I really loved it. Thank you for the kind comment!

      Hugz
      Himler


  • Daizy21
    October 18, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Stunning,You made those words yours, maybe everyone should read this,Thanks for entering Himler!


  • Daizy21
    October 14, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    "War is not the answer
    The answer is within you"

    Within You -Ray LaMontagne

1 - 10 of 10