Sawdust rises as creaks the old, barn door,
The dank ends meet and glide, earth and decay;
Soft, little eyes peer within, antique farm décor-
Wagon wheel cracked, easy rests in the shade,
Splayed in croft, layers of time on it lay;
Where Frost crept in and wood-split in His raid,
Fierce was the clime that a grave of it made.
Small hands on it explore historic gloom,
Young child, crouched over desperate yearn
For a savior to lift life’s ugly doom;
Relic representing all autumns passed-
When Morn shivered and nature’s hues did turn,
And reaped well of the harvest, well surpassed,
As celebrants cringed, winter coming fast.
The barn wails, crisp wind tapping to come in-
Scratch and scurry, furry mouse runs behind
The comfort of his worn Wagon Wheel Inn.
Staid in wheezing barn, the girl silent still,
Reposed, for it is this moment she pined
To last eternal, though it never will;
Moments pass on and leave new ones to fill.
Young girl weeps, though too young, does she know?
Tragedy of once vibrant life, now old-
Come remnants of first seed farmer did sow
To little farmhouse and barn, hardly there;
Now shambles strewn with an era drawn cold,
Sold and awaiting, amongst autumn flare,
Will soon vanish with the blissful fall air.
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Excellent! Very nicely done. The amount of detail in the poem stole my heart. Very well done!
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This captures my heart completely. "To little farmhouse and barn, hardly there;/ Now shambles strewn with an era drawn cold, / Sold and awaiting, amongst autumn flare,/ Will soon vanish with the blissful fall air." I am old enough and have lived in rural areas for long enough to have seen this happen. In my collection of photos I have a section for old, deserted and neglected farm buildings. It is so sad to go through them and remember them as they were when I was just a young man. When I get myself organised it may be well worth making a book of photos with your poem in pride of place. This poem has resurected memories from 'an era drawn cold'. An excellent poem invoking emotions i thought I had overcome long ago. Congratulations.
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Wow, this is amazing. It's a wonderful poem with such vivid imagery. I'm reminded of an old barn here...
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In shock!
I love it especially the details of everything. Great job!!!!
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i really like the second stanza, especially the like about winters getting close. Also , the line about the wheezing barn is a real winner.
tragedy of once vibrant life
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I am speechless.
Sawdust rises as creaks the old, barn door,
The dank ends meet and glide, earth and decay;
Soft, little eyes peer within, antique farm décor-
Wagon wheel cracked, easy rests in the shade,
Splayed in croft, layers of time on it lay;
Where Frost crept in and wood-split in His raid,
Fierce was the clime that a grave of it made.
I've just been writing poetry for a little under a year now. If I get to this level of ability in the next 10 years, I will be thrilled. You have such a gift for bringing out some of the most vivid imagery I have read in a long time. Your flawless rhyme scheme and language are just as brilliant. Bravo!!
Knight70
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Very vivid write. Reminds me of my Grandparents ranch -- long long ago GOOD memories.
Lady Dragonwyck
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Thanks so much for the lovely comment! Yeah, I based this on an old farm that was one of the last remaining in the prairie where I used to live.
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There are many a vacant farm house in my area, as that this is a large farming community. The small towns have dwindled and the discarded lives of days past is very evident as small communities struggle now to keep schools open and earn a living for those who are left. great write.
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Thanks for the marvelous comment! I grew up right on the outskirts of the countryside where there were many farming communities scattered abroad. Like you mentioned, most of them were struggling to keep schools open and survive. This piece was based on the last old farm that remained of the prairie land where I lived; it was recently burned down and developed.
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