If I were a drink
you would love me
A bottle of red wine
is what I would be
Like a book
with a well worn page
I would definately get
better as I did age
As I mature
the better the taste
You would want all of me
definately no waste
A tingle to your lips
like drinking from a glass
Something so tasty
too good to pass
You would know straight away
that you`re on a winner
Always wanting me with you
as you sit down to dinner
After you`ve eaten
you will take hold of me
Taking me into your mouth
such a delicacy
You`ll appear a little embarrassed
as your lips turn red
Maybe if you have the notion
you will take me to bed
Beware, don`t overdose
although easy it would be
Sleep well after but
wake up feeling sickly
That is my opinion
and it is only mine
I believe I am getting better
each year like good wine
I`m sure you will love
the pleasure I`ve brung
As I pass through your lips
and roll on your tongue
Author notes
Contest entry
A contest entry
- Pour Me A Drink, Please by Dalaney.
775 points, ended October 27, 2007, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anything that has good rhyme!(pre-writes allowed) by ExpectingMommy18.
650 points, ended October 25, 2007, 73 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - 4:44 - a n y t h i n g by the chase.
900 points, ended October 26, 2007, 45 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - 133rd Contest by Tarja.
450 points, ended January 3, 2008, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Red Wine. by Poetryintheblood.
550 points, ended January 8, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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very sensual write ...even though it is about wine... i love what you did with this! makes me want a glass right now.... tingly 0n my lips!
lovessss
becca*rose*
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Perhaps I could be your Merlot
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Thank you for your beautifully penned entry, good luck in my contest, Josie
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This had a quick and bouncy flow that was enjoyable and I also liked the rhyming. However you failed to follow directions so better luck next time.
RULE:
Put what option you chose in your author's notes. -
elusive and quite enhancing
great metaphor usage with the wine age and you to be loved in the passing years of numbers.
very well written
keep writing till there is no ink left
Tamara
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This is really good!i really love it!
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well done...
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I recently learned what "pedestrian rhyme" is; I think this is a wonderful example.
After this, I find that dessert is an ill conceived notion, as my appetite has wandered out along the lines of the Serengeti.
Overall, this needs an overhaul.
I need a drink. -
Holy Tuscany Chianti Batman!!!
Speechless, which is rare for me, Best tasting poem to date!!! Line 8 does sound akward try "better as I aged" instead.
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I did not know what to think, awwwww or lol, it's hard to not look at the balls hanging from your furry friend and take this in depth. I good idea but I can't help but laugh.
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I liked it but this seemed a little forced. I loved the last line. I think this could be made better cause I really love the idea. I was sad to see your guestbook entry, why were you so mean to that guy. Shame shame, I think your wine may have gone bad.
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Hmmm. Pour me another!
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Oh dear, that was enticing.
The 2nd to last line is missing a capital I. -
well i read this at 930 in the morning and all I could think of was a bottle of red wine sounded really good right about now!! thank you for the idea! great poem and good luck in the contest. thank you for entering
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Hmmm!!
if only i liked and drank wine!
but this was simply put
"Superb"
very well done...once again!
♥ Dani -
Delightfully devilish
in a way...hiccup!
Love, Lane
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