a green star explodes halfway, an eclipsed blue-gray sky;
shining brightly, the moment i lay, and frozen time,
hands clasped and hearts aweigh--calm, passionate tears excite;
ecstasy's mountain, my fate: star-crossed, two souls collide.
this is where i fall for you; let me die in your eyes.
my lungs fill to the top with chemical butterflies...
let me hold you closer to me!
(should i pause even to take one meaningless breath?)
[serotonin overflow]--"i love you to death."
i need your kiss to carry on!
she means everything to me...this is our song.
sweet cliché! ink hearts on lined paper happiness,
giggling in kindled embers, smite my lament!
smitten with love!--irrational, devoid of sense.
suddenly irrational love songs make a lot more sense.
and all my senses come alive.
the way you look. [the angels' jealousy!]
the way you sound. [a song of sympathy.]
the way you feel. [soft skin, must be dreaming!]
the way you smell. [elysian roses envy.]
the way you taste. [ambrosia...mortality fading.]
and i fall endlessly.
no one has ever made me feel this way.
[i can't even remember the last time
i was this happy!]
all my senses come alive.
it finally feels great to be alive.
and through the night, i will reach for my skyline.
i might be obsessed and i hope you don't mind.
A contest entry
- Love Poems. by OurxBeginning.
300 points, ended February 12, 2008, 49 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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I really liked this. It's creative and the imagery is just gorgeous. I loved the ending, sums it up perfectly.
Love is wonderful.
Thank you for entering and good luck.
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You seem to change tone from the beginning of the poem to the end...first it is a tumulting sea of words, that don't make any particularly clear meaning.......but then it evens out into much clearer sentences. I think this may turn some people away, but personally, I think it has a nice touch...like you're sorting through complicated emotions and then finding how you clearly feel. I really like how you literally 'spill your heart out...' you do a great job of expressing images, feeling, and emotions! Keep up your great style, and good luck with your girl.
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