I’m bleeding but there’s no pain.
Does this mean I lived my life in vain?
All the fights I’ve lost,
The deepest dearest cost…
Was me.
I’ve seen a thousand tragedies,
Lived a million brutal fantasies,
That left me broken upon the floor.
Now my name is etched upon the peeling door.
I think I’m going down.
It was written in my DNA
At least that’s what the doctors say.
I was never meant to have survived,
I made them promise I wouldn’t be revived.
The vision begins to fade.
Never seen water turn so red,
Like the crimson wave of my death bed.
The Reaper is waiting
For his tragic maiden.
The world has turned on mute.
Breathing shallows,
The body becomes hollow.
It begins to turn a shade of blue,
The colour of the rose I once gave you.
Ourmynothingsaviours.
Author notes
An oldie.
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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I loved the title initially... very powerful and mindboggling.
I think that you could take everything... all of your images, your comparisons, the way that you write... to the next level, if you were outside of the cage of the rhyming that you'd used. But even so, very fantastic. :] -
Masterful, and reminiscent of Booksie days of old, lol.
Love the stanza:
Breathing shallows,
The body becomes hollow.
It begins to turn a shade of blue,
The colour of the rose I once gave you.
Because it reminds me of a friend of mine, his G/F told him she'd marry him if he gave her a true blue rose...unfortunately, he never found one. This is simplistic, yet strung together so eloquently. It's another favourite of mine.
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Powerfull
"I'm bleeding but there's no pain" Sounds about how it is for me when I cut. So numb that it isn't realized at all. As always well done!!! Enjoy every bit I have read of yours. You are definately head places with your words.
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Interesting write, its something different which i like. Im loving the darkness of this piece. the flow is nicely done.
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"I've lived a thousand tragedies."
reminds me of what I used to say a few years ago, that my life was one long soap opera. I like the peeling door -- so sordid.
The images of blood are so vivid. Fantasy?
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