As I walk through this pouring rain
I am in a trench of water and mud
It is dripping through my hair and onto my face
Down my eyelashes and falling to my lips
Pooling on my cheeks
Thunder crashes around me
Lightning strikes and I
Throw my head back, consumed by this freedom
My arms swing wildly around me
And I dance in circles
I fall and roll in the wet earth,
Drinking happiness from the skies
Author notes
Free Verse.
A contest entry
- Week-end Quickie, Judge Sunday evening CST, Under 18 only.... by butterflywriter.
700 points, ended October 14, 2007, 11 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Blank Cheque by sca.
777 points, ended November 1, 2007, 48 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Ages 13 and Under ~ Enter your best prewrite by Amunet Wolfbane.
300 points, ended November 9, 2007, 19 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Don't even lie, tell me what you think.
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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This is a wonderful poem dear with excellent imagery but i am going to have to remove it from the contest please re-enter one of your poems you won gold with I saw you have two So enter one of those please Thanks and Good luck in the new year
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WOW AMAZING!!! I LOVE IT!!
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I really like the fact you have taken quite an overused subject (rain) and made something completely positive around it, instead of all the negative poems that exist with this
Really great you dared to do this and remarkable how well you got away with this
Beautiful imagery you've captured too!
Leander -
I LOVE IT!!!
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I feel there sh/could be a line break after the 5th and 10th lines.
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thanks for entering, but i closed the contest due to almost no entries at ak.. I shall try again with those of you that did enter,so message me your user name and i shall make a contest ONLY for those of you who entered.thanks.
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the imagery in this piece is awesome
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As I walk through this pouring rain
I am in a trench of water and mud
It is dripping through my hair and onto my face
Down my eyelashes and falling to my lips
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I like this, I have often done that
...Simply Me♥ -
"I fall and roll in the wet earth,
Drinking happiness from the skies"
I really like those lines. It's like you wrote about things and made them into your own interpretation. Like, drinking happiness from the skies - that would have been sadness in most other poems. I like your optimism (sp?). Great job!
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