batter loads its field
strike three your out, hot dogs!
get um while their hot
In a list
A contest entry
- Baseball Haiku by azure85.
600 points, ended October 27, 2007, 29 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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Baseball is the only tolerable American sport. I wonder why you call it the World Series when only Americans participate.
Anyway, corrections:
your -- you're
um -- them?
their -- they're
The punctuation in this is weird and doesn't even fit the sentence structure. I was thinking more along the lines of
"Batter loads the field.
Strike three; you're out! Hot dogs!
Get them while they're hot!"
...But that's just me.
-hiraeth -
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thank u
thank u for the comments given to my ku. I see ur corrections, but will give consideration for them. When ur at the game and ur downing a hot dog and coke, tend to use slang. These are slangs used at the ballgame. Saddie23
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Haha, I'm loving all these baseball haikus. They're so high tempo and exciting compared to the languid style of most.
Good luck in the contest
Never ♥ -
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Thank u
Wow!! I'm so impressed of the response given to my ku and thank u for the sentiments given. Saddie23
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way to go feel the thunder in the stadium roar and rip as you all shout, good luck in all mm
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way to go!!
the humor given was funny lol. Thank u for the wonderful critique given. Saddie23
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It's those peanuts, Cracker-Jacks and hot dogs that make for that PERFECT game!
Enjoyed the read, and best wishes to you in the contest!
Jo
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yum, yum!
U just added to my hunger can't wait to feast on the baseball food. It makes me hungry just thinking about it lol. I do love the game.Saddie23 -
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Well, don't forget the beer guy!
Jo -
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ya!!
forgot about the good beer that they serve all too well, by the time the games are over and ur tummy is full ends in the perfect game. Saddie23 -
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Well, you see how it works is that if you're able to do the wave long enough without falling over the cheap-seat railing, you work off that full tummy and you're ready for more beer!
Jo -
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ya!!
get too drunk and then u starting rooting for the wrong team or fall down the bleachers. Its happened lol. Saddie23 -
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I'm laughing so hard here--So that was YOU I saw on TV at Yankee stadium last weekend??? LOL
It's funny what those TV cameras might catch. I remember years back during a Monday night football game when Don Meredith and Howard Cosell were announcers. I think OJ may have been in the mix then too, but not sure. Anyway, the cameras panned down on a middle-aged attractive woman in the stands. Don Meredith remarked how pretty she was when she started picking her nose, still unaware she was being televised. I remember him saying, "Well, she was ALMOST perfect."
Well, now by that story I've kinda lost my appetite...
Jo
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batter loads its field
strike three your out, hot dogs!
get um while their hot
LOL I love your AHA, you hear them in the background during all that action! Nice haiku!
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Too cool!
I'm glad u found my ku amusing lol. Thank u for the wonderful sentiments.Saddie23
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hmmm I am hunrgy somehow...
nice ku!
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Wow!!
U speak my language. I love the sport, but love hot dogs more at the game and the popcorn so buttery that melts in ur mouth. Thamk u for commenting and applaudes. Saddie23
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