Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

Disconsolately

Stones slide to clunk
as  remembrance
takes on new meaning
I sighed a river
full of emptiness
to wash away
anamnesis,
then sift for  gold
through the corners
of this despotic mind..

I tried to slow to still
yet it seems chaos
finds solace
amongst this new found land
weeds with roots too deep
to be wrenched away
healed yet unexpurgated,
dreams of cleansing
disavowing
I misunderstood





this is who I am



My truth

Forever

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 5 of 5

  • misselaineous
    October 19, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    CONGRATS ON THE SHINY ACCOLADE


  • astralshepherd gold member
    October 16, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Thank you so much for entering this in the contest, I really do appreciate the effort. The only detraction I could find in your entry is in the flow as this poem has found wings to soar aloud its own name brilliantly. Imagery, word choice-vocabulary and impact are all high marks. Target aimed at, target hit, dead center. Blessings and best wishes, ~richard



    1) Content 9
    2) Originality 9
    3) Flow 8.5

    4) Word choice (vocabulary and/or rhyme) 9
    5) Imagery 9.5
    6) Grammar 9

    7) Form 9
    8) Spelling 10
    9) Emotional Impact 9.5

    10) Rumination factor (how well does the poem make me ponder) 10

    .
    astralshepherd’s completely subjective total score =92.5

    .


    • lisargh
      October 17, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Wow, thankl you so much for the lovely trophy, to be honest I am a amazed as the standard was so high!! surely surely mine did not compare...
      but definately thank you it is very much appreciated xxxxxx

  • misselaineous
    October 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    every root leaves a scar
    every wound, though healed, can bleed when scratched at

    the art is in the knowing, the knowing and the remembering that you are strong and powerful and never were to blame, the knowing that you are loved and loveable for you, for who you are...

    this poem made me sad ... but it also made me truly remember that i love you

    elaine

    • lisargh
      October 15, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Wow beautiful words and oh so true...put much more beautifully than my poem..but sentiments exact!!

      thanks 4 gettin it babe xxxxxxx
      love you xx

1 - 5 of 5