She felt sick and numb
all over, the pit of her stomach
churned; the grave in front of her
was a chasm of despair,
adorned with
bittersweet niceties.
A shuddering urge, a gentle
shock wave moved
up and down
the back of her neck, it was
a rolling subdued thunder
emanating from within.
Tears began streaming
like sun drenched droplets
of briny rain; this moment
in her young life was as real
as she would ever
care to remember.
Her father would never
see her graduate from college,
her future children would never
bounce on her father’s knee
or call him grandpa,
watching his face light up.
He loved the military
she thought, maybe
sometimes too much and
she could not bear to look up,
as the soldier handed her mother
a neatly folded flag.
Author notes
4.)"War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things. The decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feeling which thinks that nothing is worth war is much worse. The person who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which is more."
-John Stuart Mill
In a list
A contest entry
- PROMPTS! PROMPTS! MILITARY! PATRIOTIC! PRE-WRITES ALLOWED. by Broken-and-Alone.
700 points, ended October 11, 2007, 17 entries
Honorable winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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A very poignant piece. Sad and heartfelt imagery too.
Deep regrets are keenly felt.
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I am over on the other side of the Atlantic, my friend, but the same is happening here. Young people still think it is worthy to wear the military uniform of their country with pride but not enough people care about those who don't return to their families. 'Those also serve who can only wait'. Sorry I am not sure if that is right but my heart goes out to all who have family serving in war zones. With my Father serving in WW2 this girl could so easily of been me many years ago but I was lucky. Thank you for sharing a very thought provoking write.
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Beautiful our comment words. Your poem was sad and all to real. Your comment by Johun Stuart Mill is so right on also.
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very good
I am glad this won a trophy. I found this to be deeply moving. I love the choiceof words and the kind of feeling it evokes, through an assortment of memories and vivid descriptions. Congrats!
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Very good write! Good luck with the contest!
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