i cant help but think

The thoughts that go on in my mind, aint worth mentioning.
The little images in my head, aint worth drawing.
But you! Oh you want it all.
Every thought i have you got to know.
Every image  have youve got to see.
Well guess what im lying.
When i tell you im fine (LIES)
When i tell you i dont mind if you go see your guys (LIES)
When i tell you i dont want to die (LIES)
But when i tell you i love you i swear its the truth.
I cant help but keep you out my loop.
Youll be sane there. Whereas Im going mad.
Im depressed when Im not with you.
You take my mind off it all.
I swear Ill always be with you.
I swear Ill always be faithful.
But i cant make broken promises.
I cant promise Ill be here in person.
Or I cant promise I wont cheat you out of seeing me every day.
Cause right now Im listening to our song with a knife in my hand.
Ive been here so many times before yet somehow it feels different.
Im in a happy place with you as much as I dont want to lose you.
I have to go. I take the knife to my wrist, as i inscribe your name on my pure white wrist.
I scream out! 'I love you with all I ever was, for you taught me love'
Youll never hear those words i Cry out for you.
For when you find me youll blame yourself.
Youll call me selfish.
Youll call me mad.
But youll go on in life blaming me.
Blame me cause i left you but not cause i love you.
Look deep inside youll find me there.
Holding your hand with a proud smile.
guiding you through helping you out.
keeping you sane keeping you live.

Youll never stop hearing my words of regret!!