Rest a while red hunter.
Lay down and sleep.
While I run outside and sing Southern songs and shout
'It's Spring! Hooray!'
Poor hunter.
Here I am. See me rise, green and ready for another happy race.
I've escaped you yet again.
Don't remind me that you will wake up
and call your icy friends to chase me
and hold me down to the earth.
While you dream of leaves falling
and listen to the wheedling of the cold and surrender your place,
I am here to tease you, and I wear
short cotton dresses and toss my hair at you and skip away.
Don't remind me that I will be like you are now.
Don't marry me to that old man!
Don't change my name and make me hide my face -
sleep a little more while I am out to play.
Poor red Northern hunter.
A contest entry
- October New Member's Contest by AP Greeters.
450 points, ended November 7, 2007, 34 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
How can I speak to the Red hunters moon when here in the Southern hemisphere, our spring is beginning? Forgive this 'reflection'...
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Interesting piece...
It brought up a great deal of images and thoughts - mostly of young women being married off to old men, but also of a difference in seasons.
I love your descriptions and your word choices, especially "wheedling".
Excellent job!
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Welcome to Allpoetry
Red hunter's moon?? I thought they were of the yellow caste
Anyways, a good poem. good luck in the contest and thanks for the entry..
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welcome. this was unique and had a fantasy, nature feel. playful like a rabbit.
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Hello Mate, I suppose you must just remember your autumn, which is our spring, am I right? Well
Welcome to AP. I am a volunteer greeter. In this capacity, my role is to help usher you in to the experiences of this site, to answer any questions you may have, & to help you resolve any problems which may come up. Now for this contest, I will try my best to give you constructive criticism.
You are certainly bound to your place. However I see you do have imagination. Good poem. Keep writing.
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Great Contrasts!
Awesome imagery! Your vital and tender application of a different moon under a Southerly influence is remarkable! Ha....that's like me writing about spring right in the middle of our October cold rain. It can be done by reflection, n'est-ce pas?
Very good free verse!
*Suggestions*
For form and eye appeal, I would level out
the lines more evenly. This piece could
be whittled to allow that. Some 'filler' words
skipped, thereby condensing.
~ The first word capitals aren't needed in the last
stanza. It's just my thoughts on it.
Welcome to the site!
I wish you the best!
i i
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Sounds like he may possibly be tired from all the excursion hahaalol
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WELCOME TO ALLPOETRY!
lol..it is forgiven. I think this was wonderful. Powerful images and such lovely words.
"Don't remind me that you will wake up
and call your icy friends to chase me
and hold me down to the earth."
Loved the metaphors. Welcome and I wish you luck.
Despair
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