Gone now
Nothing left to say
Not even a sweet memory
of what once was
I can’t remember why
or what it was
I felt
Or for whom
All that is left
Is an emptiness
Where my soul
Once was
Or was it
In a list
A contest entry
- ~ Erased ~ by Heart Sutra.
1750 points, ended October 28, 2007, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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wow that was so amazing and very cool you write very good poems i dont think there is anything to fix you arer a great poem writer it makes me feel deppressed
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loss of any kind shows its wounds
this was a well writen poem with a deep message
i felt the pain behind the words
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i like it
Short and sad . A very well written piece of work
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I am so sorry. This is so sad, but every word is so delicate, and you have written an amazing peice.
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Simplicity is Sometimes Best
Sometimes the shortest pieces
have the most meaning
This piece was absolutely lovely
You can hear the sadness when your reading this.
^-^
Blessings Be,
Korin -
I feel the sadness within this piece. I agree with the previous comment in that it is simple, yet it is it's simplicity that sets it off and makes it stand out. Keep writing. You are very good indeed.
All the best
Wayne
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Yes, this is a feeling I can relate to as well.
I like the simplicity you have used in expressing this feeling...of loss and memory that lingers.
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Very cool what you have done here. First you present the issue as you have felt it and put the question to your reader , just as you are trying to discover it for yourself. An excellent technique. Really nice work!
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Like being mad and not knowing why. I used to be this way when I was younger, I guess it was the energy rush I got from anger. Anyway, this has such a dark and empty feel to it. Hope all is well. If ya need, drop aline.
Keep the ink flowin girl.
Head up and drive on.
Thanx for sharing.
Rodney
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I know what you mean. Sometimes you feel an emptiness and you aren't even sure where it came from... like a fingerprint.
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Seems like really "erased" your mind on this one! I like that. Keep up the good work and best of luck in the contest.
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