I shiver and grasp tightly my own arms,
I am evaporating, dissipating...
Misting into a vapor on a barren wind.
Nothing will be born of this moment...
Caught trying to make a beggar's offering,
Before a graven image...between smiles.
A contest entry
- PIF PROMPT by penman.
525 points, ended October 11, 2007, 8 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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Passion
Words of longing and need. the poet sends a message in a soft and gentle way. Sex, all to often the game. But oh true love a very magical thing. -
Phenomenal!!! Well, silly me, I have never properly introduced myself. My name is Sydney. I am 13 years old from Florida. Nice to meet you. This piece is very emotional and imaginary. Well done! Congrats on the gold! You deserved it!!!!
Sydney
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I wonder
That image you speak of. Is it of life and age or perhaps what we see as life fading and the grand finale setting in. and alone we must deal with it. I wonder.
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this was fantastic
i wonder if we still are
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a vapor on the wind
Is anything left of you now
Are you still here somehow
Or are you bound
Never to be found
For to be seen the wind won't allow -
Excellent imagery in this write....Congrats on the gold!
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I love your take on the prompt.
I shiver and grasp tightly my own arms,
I am evaporating, dissipating...
Misting into a vapor on a barren wind.
I love the imagery in this piece. In a way, I felt as if these were the thoughts of a homeless person, utterly consumed by desperation. Beautiful poetry....
Don
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superb
this is superb poetry...truly.
The image is wonderful...but you do not need it...LOL...your well crafted words paint a far richer image than any computer screen ever will.
Well deserved Gold!
Blessings! Tammy
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loved your imagery, excellent write! Congrats to you on the Gold!
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Wonderful
Very well done. Best of luck in the contest.
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So much sadness expressed with such lovely vivid imagery. Well written. An interesting take on the prompt. Loved it.
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The imagery in this is wondefully penned! I love it!
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I feel such sadness from your words! I am evaporating, dissipating...Nothing will be born of this moment..You are a wonderful poetess my sweet sister! Good luck in the contest
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wow... misting into vapor on a barren wind... beautifully written...
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