I sit alone in the sandy beach
Watching two children building sandcastles
And I bring back memories, remembering
How fast we grew up and changed
We became shy to even speak
And it’s hard for me to tell you how I feel
Though every night I imagine you are my bolster
And I hug and have a little chat with it
And now in this serene sandy beach
I want you sitting right beside me
Even if you do not speak, letting silence grow
Just your presence would mean so much
A contest entry
- 15 lines or less... by xTomorrowx.
450 points, ended October 26, 2007, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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very nice
I was reminded of my own childhood. we all change so fast and then, suddenly, relationships become strained and ordinary things seem weird.
the second stanza was relatable. the last few lines were touching as there is a longing but it is not fulfilled and the last two lines are so true. sometimes, just the prescence of someone gives us a harder time to breathe and for the heart to pump.
good luck!
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Beautiful piece. You have many heartfelt lines here, and I especially loved the second stanza. I am sure the fire is still there, as a remainder of the past. All you have to do is ignite it again.
This was a lovely piece my dear. Oh- I love the last two lines. I really agree with you
Great job && best of luck
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well done! i love this poem, i love the last stanza, it's great! =)
great write, thanks for entering and good luck! =) -
Good poem! Might I suggest changing the last line to "Just your presence would be enough"? I think it would make the poem flow better, just a thought.
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