you speak,
with a voice like rolling thunder;
resonating in harmony
with the words still thrumming, vibrating,
vaulting the melody of my lilting chords to the skies,
to be chased by black clouds carrying your voice;
the earth trembles
as we compose our rhapsody
you speak,
with clouds whirling across your face;
the wind of our contention
blowing their billowing shadows in raging patterns;
gathering in your eyes,
they churn about dark cliffs towering there,
from whose heights I may yet fall;
even now my footing capricious
where none but I have stood
you speak,
and lightning flares in a halo;
crowning your glory and striking me blind,
in a moment igniting a brushfire, an inferno
blazing with the kindling of unstoked flames;
adverse charges pulling,
pushing at latent summer heat;
the air sizzles with the promise
of elements burning
you speak,
a tempest on the horizon;
mounting on the turn of evenfall,
as violent in its nature as it was sudden;
ruler of turbulent skies, chanting your furor,
consuming us both in a whirlwind of temper;
forthwith the firmament shakes,
and I shudder at your attention
you speak,
and your cry rings in my ears;
the storm is flying,
unable to steady the tumult
arising in a tropic like ours;
to the heavens you take, trailing a cloak of rain,
and I of two minds
yearn for the chaos of swirling clouds,
for I cannot forget;
and chasing your voice,
I run to the sound of thunder
Author notes
I cannot remember where I found that opening line, but I loved it a great deal, and made use of it. This was written with one central theme, but I wove a few separate ideas into the poem as well. This one sits close to my heart.
***Line breaks edited January 1, 2008.
In a list
A contest entry
- Pen Me a Poem with a Quote by Cannonsfire.
1750 points, ended October 13, 2007, 12 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - All Time Favorite! by Mezclita.
600 points, ended October 13, 2007, 40 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - What Is Passion? by 2lullabyhaven.
425 points, ended July 5, 2008, 13 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
I would love to hear your interpretation.
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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I call that personal power
thanks for entering it into my contestlol
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Mighty and powerful is your pen. This was a well written piece with great emotion. Thank you for sharing it and best wishes. Keep that pen handy dear poet. ~Midnight Lace
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Very thought provoking.
This poem can be interpreted in at least three different ways in my opinion. One is of the raging storm of nature. Another is of Gods warning to mankind. And the last is of two people in conflict with each other. This is an extremely well thought out poem and is done with such imagery that I can feel the storm at it's height in nature. I can also feel the voice of God admonishing mankind in this. As well as a lover that is angry with its intended and stalking off in a violent rage. Whatever your intent was this is very powerful and extreamly well written. I really enjoyed reading this.
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Very aptly put. Thanks for the applause. =)
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this is amazing! nice imagery. i like how you always repeat "you speak" at the beginning. it ties it together well.
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wow...that is beautiful. holy crackerjacks, I am in the presence of a great one.
~VoT
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Awesome poem nice imagery........i love the sound of thunder
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I love it. My interpretation is less high-minded than kateomnipotent's though, it made me think of two lovers and the power of speech.
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I deliberately left my author's comments vague, but that slow and sultry rumble between lovers is certainly a feel I wanted to capture--along with a few other things. =)
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What a wonderful work.
Such an insightful piece.
As if you were writing to God himself, or whatever being you serve.
Quite moving..
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The punctuation of the lines is slighty confusing, but amazing use of adjectives.
you speak,
with clouds whirling across your face;
the wind of our contention
blowing their billowing shadows in raging
patterns; gathering
in your eyes, they churn about
dark cliffs towering there, from whose heights
I may yet fall; even now
my footing capricious where none but I
have stood
This verse must be my favorite, for though the whole poem flows beautifully, this one seems even more exceptional. Perhaps the lining could be revised, for with the way the lines are split, the punctuation seems odd.
Also, I love that you chose to use free verse other than rhyming, perhaps that is why the lining is odd. Too often, people attepmt to make their poems rhyme, and it is distracting and breaks the flow, stealing attention from the meaning of the writing.
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Simply amazing...
I adore the feel of this write.
You have composed the most beautiful ballad,
Incredible imagery..
Wonderful journey
Thank you...
Peace
~A~
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Fantastic.
A person can best be understood by knowing the people around him, and their condition. I feel like I am able to know you now, thank you. I enjoyed the imagery, and the connection between your subject and nature. The poem flows very nicely. You've chosen not to rhyme, and you're brave for it. I actually enjoy rhyme, and what it can give to a poem, but it can sometimes be detrimental and destracting from a works real meaning. This poem went without ryhme and is better for it, which shows us your skill as a writer. Again, thank you.
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In everything I do, I strive for that connection with the reader through my words--I am glad you have found it. Blank verse is a new style for me that appears to be working; most of my earlier things have end rhyme.
Thanks very much for the applause. =) -
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No thanks are necessary. A great read is hard to find, and applause is only secondary to the connection.
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I've always loved the sound of thunder since I can remember... it's funny that i was never scared of it on the contrary I felt so safe knowing there was something much larger than me... so powerful and moving.... like this piece! Quite amazing too how even by around the fourth time I read "you speak" it still seemed new... thank u 4 entering!
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This so reminds me of how I felt in Africa, to see the beauty yet see the despair, to feel its heart nad know others had sensed it too but for fear of the unknown had not unleashed their fury to the ones who cause the misery. Of course I cannot do that, I can see and then I have to do!. I find this stirring, emotional and very well written in metaphor and imagery. It brings tears or rage and of joy back to my eyes. Thank you for a wonderful entry. Love, C
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