I will paint you into immortality,
Beautiful and perfect-
Drench every virgin crevice of love
in the drowning jade of your eyes.
Robin-breast red and cherry blossoms
for you forever, my love.
Shades of sweetness and devotion.
Crumple, crinkle, stumble over me
like ribbons dancing over maypoles-
We shall dance in dreams like carefree children
playing kiss-chase on cracking fingers of hope
jutting out into oceans.
Tell me that you love me
and sing to me 'til I sleep.
I am yours and waiting, love,
for you to come when I dream.
Author notes
About a long distance relationship.
I know this is a little rough- couldn't tie thoughts together.
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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This is beautful....I just started reading your work and I am moving onto one of your next pieces, very impressive, this was so sweet and meaningful!
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Blushing :)
Robin-breast red and cherry blossoms
for you forever, my love.
Shades of sweetness and devotion.
... Enfin quelqu'une qui me comprend -
you seriously need to change that picture... it's a real eye sore!!! as for the rest of the poem, i couldn't spot any flaw... just one minor suggestions: perhaps you could alter the 1st line of the 2nd stz as "Red Robin-breast and cherry blossoms" just to enhance the alliteration... but even then it still is very good. each stanza is a piece of gem which i can go on reading and pondering for a long time... i've already devoted 15 mins just reading it.. and i can read it longer... i particularly loved the opening stz!!! it was amazing!!! i have even copied that stz on a paper so that i can read it in the morning... i hope u don't mind me doing so
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Great
Awwwwwww........ Baby pie dragon that was good. Lovey dovey poem for sure! A very good write!
Andy
XXX
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Beautiful. Absoultly beautiful. Damn Sarah, it seems every single peice I've read by you is awesome. You're amazing babe. Great job.
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