A life for a life
The shadow within me grows
Fear's seed
planted in dead night
It's leaves are hatred
It's roots drain my soul
The dark tree grows
And I am in its shadow.
If need be
I'll cut myself down
to fell this darkness.
A life for a life.
Author notes
Pro-choice. When a girl will die (from suicide or other diease) because they are pregnant then abortion is an option.
Maybe it is just me but I would rather one life lost than two.
Also I don't think calling abortion murder is good cause when a girl has gone through the hard decision of choosing an abortion, has had to live with that, she doesn't need you making her feel worse. Why go through an abortion only to kill yourself anyway cause people go around saying you are a murderer?
Further I find it weird someone would describe themselves as pro-life when they would support a law like that in Nacaragua which has caused the deaths of 87 women since it was implemented earlier this year.
Option 1
A contest entry
- 100% Prolife (2 MORE OPTIONS ADDED) by duana.
300 points, ended October 24, 2007, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Abortion--Pro-choice by twilight seduction.
450 points, ended November 10, 2007, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Abortion: Anything Goes by SignifyingNothing.
425 points, ended November 18, 2007, 38 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
It doesn't feel like it flows. Suggestions? How does it feel to you?
Comments
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"If need be, I'll cut myself down, to fell this darkness" so sad that the speaker of this poem, and many women, would take her own life in order to destroy the life inside her. Pregnancy is not a disease, it is a condition a woman must endure for nine months (though it is far from easy) when the baby can be then put up for adoption. Hard to imagine that kind of hatred for an innocent life.
Yet still- this is a very good write. Great metaphors used in this- a seed planted in the dead of night, the dark tree, this is really an excellent poem.
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While when planned and no forced upon you pregnancy might not be viewed as a disease, when your in an emotionally shocked state, well I would like to see anyone reason with such an emotionally disturbed person.
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I can’t truly say I understand your poem. You left some things to the imagination and I guess I just don’t have enough imagination right now. I’ll give you and applause for strong emotions.
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Just a note about the 87 deaths of women. That is terrible. Now I ask you- how can you consider yourself pro life when you consider the deaths of millions of babies?
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Um I like the option where less people die, in general. Now that allows for abortion, because in some situations it is one or both, whether both die because of disease or suicide or something else, doesn't matter to me, the point is both die. Better if only one dies. Hence pro-maximisation of life. Which is not what they have in Nacargua, cause those deaths of those women equals two deaths, when there could have been only one. In my country our abortion laws provide for abortion when the womens mental or physical health is at risk and I think that is how it should be. Life-maximisation.
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Hmmm....I LIKE the flow of this poem, to be honest. And it is so..dark!
Interesting comment in your author's box about Nicaragua....must do some thinking about that.
Your poem was intense, to teh point, and full of mind-boggling thoughts of choice, your life or a baby's life? EXACTLY what I was looking for. -
Hello. I can see through your poetry and comments that you have a very sensitive heart and I am sure with the facts you would make right decisions. I hope you continue to read as much as you can about the essence of life, ethics, and abortion. Choices are never easy. You are right- they must be made carefully. And you are right, one should never say things to to create guilt in another person. That is simply wrong. Many people do call abortion murder to have such an effect! They don't believe it is literally murder- they just call it that as a fear tactic. But in my case I believe abortion is murder. I believe that a fetus is life as you and I are life. I believe that the most vunerable and powerless in our society must be protected.
As a poem this is very tenderly written, and your word choices and phrases are so even handed and excellent! -
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As a law student I can't believe abortion is murder for simple legal definition reasons. Murder implies a certain level of culpibility and when someone puts a gun to your head and says you or the possibly alive individual and you choose yourself, that is only manslaughter, you have the defense of necessity. Also for the fact that the technical definition of murder requires homocide, which requires a human to die, and your not a 'human' legally speaking until you can exist independently of your mother.
I say this because murder is a legal term, and padantically speaking you are using it incorrectly. Sorry, there is a reason people like me become law students, and it is because we are so incredibly picky about small things like this.
Thank you for your comment though, much appreciated, though it must seem like I have a funny way of showing it picking at your language and all. So sorry if I offended you, it was my intention only a normally useful compulsion. -
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ah I see where you are coming from now. You are right, legally it is not considered murder. I will have to think more about your comment. I do not think that the law is the last word to define things because there is so much wrong going on that is outside of legal definition, but I now understand where you are coming from. Thanks for your clarification. Duana
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We law nerds, we think everything in law, it is (and this makes me really sound so sad) our life. I can't help it, I study it all the time, and it affects everything. Poetry is my attempt to stop define everything legally and even then a lot of them have semi legal themes running through them. Oh I am well and truly infected with the legal bug. Even when considering the basic issue of abortion I can't help but bring it down to Harm and Morality theory, positivist and normative approaches, which are the basis for scope of the law.
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Your comment has made me very interested in reading your poetry now! This is something I will do after this contest is over, and I have the time.
I share your passion with defining words precisely.
I also share your deep respect for the law. I think the law is the one force in society that has the power to truly define right and wrong if it is used properly, but in a democratic society right or wrong has no real bearing on what 'becomes law'- just the will of the people - and let's face it, the will of the people doesn't exactly have a good track record. IE Hitler and Stalin may have turned into dictators, but the will of the people is what gave them their place of opportunity in the first place.
Anyway, I do not exactly have the right background to be having a conversation with a law student, lol, but I find your comments interesting! Duana -
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I don't know, believe it or not but a lot of moral and harm consideration goes into law, more harm now than morality because society has shifted away from proscribing morals these days which I see as a good thing (so now it is legal to do S&M, homosexuality and all that)
Every law has consideration in burden of proof, onus, consideration on the effects the law will have, I am learning all of this stuff cause I plan in going into law creation in the future. But yeah when it comes to things like hitler and stalin it is really up the public to control their government, you got to see it sliping and do something. Like in my country right now they are trying to pass this terrorist amendment bill, which will limit some human rights to do with proper legal procedure which has all us law students and anyone who has ever said anything against the government a tad worried. Things like that we have to do stuff about, protest tomorrow, safety is great but legal human rights are more important to me.
Background doesn't really matter when it comes to conversation about law, part of conversation is learning about the other person perspective. You are on the outside, do you know how rare it is to have someone who hasn't learnt all the theory behind law even consider having a conversation about it with me? All my friends are sick of me babbling on about the implications of s66's interaction with s167.
But I do suppose that is a little in depth it is just really interesting if have learnt about it.
Good luck with your judging! I tried that once, so tough!
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