fall comes
with its usual melancholy;
windows close, shadows have become
abstract
shorter days
push
away
the sun
this night feels more like winter
than any fall
my heart can remember
from the starless sky
dark winds
rustle through leaves
and the trees
lower
their limbs
to grieve
Author notes
inspired by:
The New Silence by Jane Hirshfield.
for my father, who passed away. I miss him.
A contest entry
- show me silence... by Nicolette.
1200 points, ended October 24, 2007, 36 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 25 of 25
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beautiful poem...with another poetic dimension...
my favourite lines:
from the starless sky
dark winds
rustle through leaves
thank you -
This author's envisioning a more stringent awareness of Wintery clime conjures thoughts in the reader in reflections of sameness felt. A deeper concideration of life and the world around her gives a sense of alive and certainly nothing taken for granted.Expressing the prompt of silent reflective thoughts well.
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You've created a nostalgic silence here. Your poems just keep on flowering as I continue scrolling through your database. "The trees lower their limbs to grieve," excellently summed up the poem on this past autumn, and it is nothing short of excellent word. Un-rhyming poems, in my opinion, just express emotion a bit more than singsong poems. You do justice to your pen.
Peace Love & Light,
Jay
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I really love this poem! I really gives me a very familiar emotion akin to what I've often felt when fall comes!
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SO BEAUTIFULLY SAID!!!!
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Thank you for the kind words.
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It seems like it has been ages since I've stumbled across your poetry. Irregardless you evoke so many things within this reader everytime I peruse your work.
You have left us with impressions of beauty although they are haunting(please forgive me for the use of the word because by no mean am I trying to insult this beautiful piece) to the love we all have lost or fear of..
This shines through the saddening hues of silence stilled between seasons of life. You have touched this soul today...
for that I Thank you
All the best in the contest
Much Love & Many Blessings~
~Joy
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Thank you so much for this wonderful heartfelt comment. Many hugs to you
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"shorter days
push
away
the sun"
I just loved those lines and the way you've placed it in the middle of this poem. The last lines are amazing too and paints the silence of loss and grief in such a poignant way. A beautiful poem...
Thank you so much for this entry.
~ Nicolette
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shorter days push away the sun... .. such poignancy.. as in death, we try to shield our eyes from that which is too bright for us, the grief and sadness is carried throughout this ....
many thanks for entering this contest and good luck too
G.x -
Hey, in spite of the sadness, I really like this - you're delving into your soul, cutting through the fog..
These milestones are never easy, but often very revealing to us - often defining our priorites, often guiding us to more meaningful paths..
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I don't know what to say here except how much I love this poem... wonderful imagery to show silence!
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Thank you sweety. I tried to applaud your comment but somehow, I'm not getting the option.
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"shorter days
push
away
the sun"
"and the trees
lower
their limbs"
You have shown silence perfectly here with this fall imagery, excellent poem
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This is so sadly tender. The lines just carry the reader away to melancholy memories. Excellent work my friend. Good luck in the contest.
Sincerely,
Leo Long
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beautifully and sadly
conveyed, with such vivid metaphor... I could almost feel the wind, and I could definitely see the trees beginning to grieve... fall is my favorite season, but it often makes me kind of sad... this is a lovely and poignant take on the idea of silence... quite eloquent and a touching and meaningful tribute, indeed...
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this night feels more like winter
than any fall
my heart can remember
Such beautifully written lines and such deep emotions felt. I'm sory for your loss Hon. There must be something in the air at this moment because I have been reflecting on the loss of my grandmother lately. Some people just have such a profound impact and leave lasting marks in the memories we carry.
♥ Touchof1der
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Thanks and I'm sorry for your loss as well. It must be fall, and the leaves dieing, and the shorter days....
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The Place of Holds & Holies
"Cast her heart gently into morning..."
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lol..I just realized me and Wanda picked out the same stanza. We do that alot!
It resonates with everyone. -
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and you and I have a habit of commenting eachother at the same time
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This is by far, one of your best, hon.
shite, I wish it were mine. It says everything.
"this night feels more like winter
than any fall
my heart can remember"
wow.
So perfect. He's more than proud right now.
You know, I know. Thank you for making me remember,
it's good to come to this place.
I've missed your voice.
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The form of this poem added creedance to the sadness and longing it portrayed...I also lost a parent recently and at times like "fall" and changes of seasons it seems a poignant time to remember. Be comforted by the memories and knowing the love he had for you
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"this night feels more like winter
than any fall
my heart can remember"
Sighhh...I have known this feeling, even in the depths of the hottest summer. A beautifully longing piece, my Friend. He knows; he misses you, too. He's saving you a spot at the table for the feast. Good luck in Nic's contest, Sweetie. Wanda
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