I love the way you bleed
As I tear through your skin with my teeth
Ripping off your clothes
And eating whats underneath
It's the most horrific pain
You've ever known
Ripping through your body
And licking the bone
I love the way you scream
As my nails start to scratch through your face
Licking the blood that runs from the cuts
Sends me to a happy place
I boiled the rest of your body
And saved it to eat for later
I need more of you around
You're what I look for in a neighbor
I use the entire body
I never like to waste
I light a candle and enjoy my dinner
I love the way you taste
Author notes
Talking Back Sunday X Panic! At The Disco
Option one
Mommas Fallen Angel
A contest entry
- Pimp up my honorable mention or trophyless by leander.
400 points, ended December 4, 2007, 86 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - JUST TWO DAYS TO REACH 1000 ENTRIES !!!! ( BE A PART OF THIS RECORD BREAKING CONTEST ) by Alex Hex.
300 points, ended May 1, 2008, 526 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Do You Have What It Takes ? by just weak hands.
800 points, ended December 12, 2008, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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Wow! This is fantastic! I wasn't sure weather to be freaked out or turned on
so I’m both.
Fantastic write this is so expressive, your words flow together perfectly
well chosen. You really make the reader feel and see as you do with this piece fantastic work well done.
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ah, i just reread my contest, and saw that you obviously chose option one ! i was definitely scared after reading this ! ;] if you could just put in your AN that you did choose option one, i'd appreciate it. i would hate to have to disqualify you for something so minor !
i love your take on the prompt. you definitely hit a home run here. anyone would run screaming if they knew what you could do ! ;] excellent write ! best of luck !!!!
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um... wow...
what option did you choose ? i need to know if it matches the guidelines, since you entered a prewrite...
this was... extremely vivid... kind of disgusting, but hey, it's dark poetry. what do you expect ? i like the rhyme and the detail. very descriptive ! good write and best of luck !
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HOLY FUCK THAT IS FUCKING SWEET THE BEST WAY TO WOW IS IT ABOUT SEX OR EATTING SOMEONE.......
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This is quite a morbid poem that you've written here
I surely hope you don't practice this in real life
Anyway, the images you've captured are quite vivid, and I like that in poetry the rhyme sounds maybe a tad bit forced here and there, but that's just a personal opinion 
Anyway, I still enjoyed this one!
thank you for entering the contest, I wish you the best of luck
Leander -
This is quite a morbid poem that you've written here I surely hope you don't practice this in real life
Anyway, the images you've captured are quite vivid, and I like that in poetry the rhyme sounds maybe a tad bit forced here and there, but that's just a personal opinion
Anyway, I still enjoyed this one!
thank you for entering the contest, I wish you the best of luck
Leander -
ok then... i think you watched too many Hanibal movies, lol. Creepy as anything, but very poeticly penned. Nice (creepy) one sis.
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I just read the first few lines... because this poem isn't the sort of thing I find satisfying to read.
But in another kind of contest that takes such poems, you might do well.
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Well, if I remember correctly your contet said it could be about anything. As long as we ended the sentence 'I love the way you...' It isn't fair to say that the poem could be about anything if you aren't going to read all of my poem because of what it's about. If you don't like dark poems then I suggest you put that in the contest description so no one will write them.
Megan -
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Sorry...
Actually, you did not follow the contest rules because this contest was a contest for poets with ten trophies or less. You have many more trophies than ten. I just checked your site and see your line of trophies. I am removing your poem from my contest at this time. -
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I'm sorry I didn't see that rule. But even so, it still isn't fair that you said the poem could be about ANYHING and not even give mine a chance because it's scary. I'm sure mine isn't the only one like that. And I'm sure they don't appreciate it either. I know you are only doing what you have to for the contest, but please, next time say that you don't like these kinds of poems. So no one will write one with false hope.
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You followed the contest rules, so I didn't disqualify your poem, and I did comment on your poem, which was my obligation as the contest host. When you enter a contest you assume the host will comment, and you might not always get praise for your poem.
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fabulous
Now this is the kind of "I love" poem that i love! nothing sappy. really gory. top notch.
I have one suggestion though, the repetion of the word licking, perhaps replace with lapping for the second one. Just a thought.
really liked the piece. Good luck in the contest. -
You're so good at gory, creepy, "what if..?" kinda poems. I really liked this, even though it made me twitch lol. I like reading these because they're so descriptive. *hugs and squeezes*
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Woah! This is pretty disturbing. Almost sickening...interesting take...very original...good luck in the contest.
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ANOTHER one... damn Meggie. Like I said in the other one, its wickedly creepy, but it can hold true meaning as well. I love this, so much. This, as well as so many other poems of yours, is a top 10. I can't express enough how much I love your poems and how great this truly is.
Kelcey
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wow... this really creeped the hell out of me. on a good note it flowed really well. good scary write. and good luck with the contest
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