I saw summer in her eyes last night
odd?? I thought to myself
what beauty is this that I'm allowed to see
her face was radiant stars twinkled in her hair
a beauty beyond human eyes
she moved as if in a dance sliding towards me
I froze, ...her eyes shone a deep chestnut,
her lips ready to part
last spring she was just as beautiful
petals of lilies sprinkled from her gown
her hands giving a fragrance of freshly sprung leaves
her perfume smelled of new blossoms
But it took no time for autumn to come
every beauty she had was completely stripped of her
left half naked but in beautiful rags
lying on the scattered autumn leaves
there she will be till winter would eat
the remaining of the warmth from her body
pale as pale death her skin covered by fallen snow
veiling the shame of her fall from her world
and there in her eyes I still saw a glow
a hope of a coming spring
I saw summer in her eyes last night
the beauty of her soul
a smile that stroke gently across her face
she will rise again whispered the trees
a queen in her spring gown
the earth will bloom with her youth again
crystal stars for her crown.
A contest entry
- Anything by Virgoan.
450 points, ended October 26, 2007, 19 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
Good job!
This is nice. The first stanza is not as strong as the other 2 stanzas. I suggest you break some of the lines or add punctuations for it will add more into this piece.
The last stanza if adjusted in its line break will be a stand alone poem.
All in all, a wonderful piece.
Thanks for sharing and keep writing.
VIRGOAN

