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Puberty

As I pluck the hands of the clock,
the pendelum swings to a damped tune.

Stranded visions to empty picture frames,
of soon to be memories of the past.

I glaze my tounge to my wet pale lips,
enjoying my sweet juice of summer...

Critics and critiques are welcome :)

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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • quantumsurveyor
    October 27, 2008

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    This is a sweet and gentle evocation with so much said in so few words. Couple of typos - pendelum = pendulum; tounge = tongue


  • jcat gold member
    December 31, 2007

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    From adolescence to adulthood... those times just fly by and than one day you find yourself sitting amongst yourself trying to cature your lost youth while enjoying looking at the old photos of yesterday's tomorrows.

  • Virgoan
    October 19, 2007
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    Beautiful. Succinct and wonderful imagery


  • puzzledone121
    October 13, 2007

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    yeah, those were the days...of idleness, leisure thoughts, just sitting around with friends or by yourself--thinking of girls...lol


  • sultan gold member
    October 7, 2007
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    Your Inner Child will return ...

    Don't worry my young sister. We all have to go through this ... and I'm sure the 'vanity' you are feeling is a bit distasteful when you think back on the innocence of being a child. She’s still there … and will come out as you develop your own female gifts. The old restrictions (picture frame) are just expanding. Thanks for the great poem. Love, Sultan


  • Tarja
    October 7, 2007
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    I think the title was somewhat misleading. I was expecting something very different.


  • darkmermaid
    October 7, 2007
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    Wow. Nice one. So much said in very few words. excellent work.


  • Marshall013004
    October 6, 2007
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    So well written for so little words..... Our lives do pass us by so quick but we must keep up with the world as we know it . this old place will not slow down for us . I like your ending..... the sweet juices of summer .... very nice ... because there is never a summer that is ever the same .. you did a nice job on this piece and thanks for sharing!!!!


  • grannyeri gold member
    October 6, 2007

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    Interesting way of writing about this topic in your title - think you meant to say swings in that second line. Time certainly does not stand still and you have said that well here. Liked that ending - sweet juice of summer works well with the title, as do the couplets in each verse.

1 - 9 of 9