EVIL LURKS
written 10.5.07
She slipped through the shadows
softly, silently
her ebony dress blending
with the darkness around her
Her mission was one of secrecy
and her invisibility
was of the upmost importance
She darted quickly
behind the old mission church
and stood still for a moment
hiding in the shadows
Glancing into the darkened window
she could see shapes on the floor
and guessed it was the children
she had come to rescue
Short steps brought her to the door
she scooted inside
and stood behind the tallest child
“Michael”, she whispered
“the children’s lives are at stake
you have all been betrayed
evil is coming for you.
Quickly gather the children
stay low, be very quiet
and follow me”.
Michael obeyed and assembled the children
She led them down some darkened stairs
into a sub-basement, dank and damp
just a sliver of light
from the full moon outside
shown on the dirt floors
There was a rustling noise
in the blackness, in the corners
possibly rats
as red glowed here and there
but the children remained quiet
Then she moved her hands across the walls
and a dim opening appeared
she swiftly herded the children into the passageway
leading them outside into the edge of the woods
where the branches sheltered and hid them
“Evil is coming” she said
“through the other side of the woods,
to burn down the mission
and to erase all knowledge of you.
We must go quickly, quietly
to the old water mill
where help is to be found.”
The children followed her silently
they knew their parents had hidden them
for safety, in the old church mission
as evil was afoot on All Hallow’s Eve
and they knew that something
must have gone wrong
and evil was loose
They trusted this lady
so they followed her
She led them through the dark woods
to the old water mill
Behind them they could hear shouts
and see the torches flying through the air
fire coming out of the mission
and thick smoke
like the gates of hell
had opened up and erupted
She led them to the near-by water fall
and guided them behind the cascades
on a narrow path
through a cave
and out of the woods
Families were awaiting
they gathered the children into their arms
and spirited them off to safety
The lady slipped back into the woods
her errand completed
standing in the midst of the swirling fog
she vanished
Author notes
Ok Az...a try at a longer one and my first attempt at a short story.
A contest entry
- For My Favorites!!! by SummerlandRayne.
466 points, ended October 16, 2007, 10 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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Great...this was magic ....it keep my interest throughout ...is there more to this ? think you have set the scene for a good short story too......peace
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Thank you so much 'poppa' for your wonderful comment and applause. I am real pleased you felt this was 'magic'. No, there's not more...lol...
blessings
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Great Job!
This kept my attention all the way through! Great job on this piece especially if its your first, keep doing it, you are good!
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Thanks so much 'DawnBaby' for the nice comment and applause. I just wrote this as a favor to a good friend here on AP. I'm not sure where the words even came from...lol.
I'm glad you enjoyed it.
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first attempt...and surely a very succesful one..i adore dark, romantic, mysterious stories, and aove all the always-present fog!!
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(did the stars work THIS time???)...they aren't lighting up for me tonight for some reason.
Thanks 'absinthia' for reading another of mine and the nice comment and applause. My 'muse' seems to be on the dark side, I think..lol..but always good, never evil - so far anyways
I love to read dark, romantic mysteries - and it does seem like a lot of them have fog...lol.
Thanks again. Please let me know when you write another poem and I will return the favor.
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Never would believed this was your first attempt at doing this.You had me gripped onto the edge of my chair all the way through it.The workmanship in this one is exquisate.So well thought out and portrayed.My hats off to you.You did a fantastic job.
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Thank you so much Michaeline for that wonderful comment! Az told me just to 'write' a story - so I did...lol. I did sort of write a story when I wrote "Shauni" also, though it was a true story - as most of my writing is.
I am very honored by your comment. Thanks again.
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Wow
This is one heck of a story. Love the imagery. It's incredibly well written and kept the suspense going throughout. As always this is a treat to read - thank you
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Thank you 'purplemoondoll'. I'm glad you enjoyed this. Have missed seeing you.
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Wow this is perfect. First try you seem like a pro to me
.Thank you for sharing and goodluck to you in hte contest.Best wishes and much love.
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Thanks Starz...beginners' luck I think..lol. Don't even know where the thoughts were coming from - I just typed them..lol...strange.
Anyways, glad you liked it. Thanks for the applause and wishes.
blessings/peace/joy
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This...is...BEAUTIFUL!! you're amazing!!! this is an awesome write!! Yo held it together so wonderfully!!! I love it!!
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Thank you so much 'irishmidnight' for the nice comment and applause. Just beginners' luck, probably, as I just started typing and the words just seemed to fall in place. I'm glad you liked it.
Thanks again.
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OMG!! No way that is your first try at long poems like this! I loved this! I am so enticed by these darkly spiritual writes...this one is so amazing! Jesus...the ending of this...the children returned to their parents! The dear lady returning to the woods and vanishing! Kindness written from your soul! I wish life was really like this. I am so touched by this, and to have it for this contest...is a blessing I cherish! Best of luck my poetic sister!
Love~
Az
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Yup, my very first try...and I have NO IDEA where these thoughts came from...lol.
Thank you so much for your wonderful comment. I am glad you liked this.
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