Booms all around you
Reflexes of a cat
You push, while I pull
A release, and you
Are both safe.
An explosion, a near
Miss
A cut on my legs
No movement
You remain
A whisper of
"Are you okay?"
A reply, "Affirmative."
A memory of long ago
Our first mission
Excitement and fear
Never failing
Always going
Our pledge, never leave
One behind
Our letter of last
Resort
Never let you die
Never give up
Never let go
Bombs go off
Nothing remains
I shout out
"Are you okay!"
No answer
I can't move
Mind works
Legs lost
Angel is next to me
I look, he stands
Go become a dad
No regrets
Can't leave you behind
Yells of "We're here
To Help!"
Angel, take him first
A look of confusion
No one there
I am alone, someone says
A scream within me
I am lifted to safety
I remain silent
My dreams of departure
Angel stands before me
I am safe, never left
Trust me
Tell my story
Give me my letter of
Last resort
Never let you die
Never give up
Never let go
So, I say this
I am your angel
You, my saving grace
Angel, I am sorry
I will become
A dad
With no regrets
A contest entry
- For Poets With 3 Trophys Or Less- Prewrites Allowed by Mercury Rising.
450 points, ended October 11, 2007, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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A very thought-provoking and stimulating poem that was a pleasure to read. I love your use of shorter lines, and the conversational tone of this piece. Best of luck in my contest, and thanks for entering.
Mercury Rising
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Thank you for commenting
Thank you for commenting on this piece. I wrote show my feelins about what a soldier goes through with his or her freinds. It came about a book I read Called Soul Sivivor about the seal team 10 what a poerful story to be shared. So this Is one of the things I thought about for a soldier would go through during a time of war. Thank you again for your kind words.
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Captivating...still taking it in
lol
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wow, powerful and open to interpretation.... i like your style and the way you stop the reader from being passive and you make us sit up and think. "what is this about>" and "what would I do if i felt like this."
great stuff.
lexy xxx -
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Thank you kindly.
I just wanted say thank you for you kind comments on this poem. This very different from the kind of poem I am use to writing about. I read a book Called Soul Survivor seal team 10. It is based on a true story so I wanted to write something about a soldier and what it is like out there and this is what I came up with. thank you again
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