Cheater by Amera at All poetry

Was
born in
December,
with a cold heart,
she can’t remember
when the hatred did start.
The relentless heart breaker,
with petty dreams that never last.
A temptress in stealth moving so fast
he’ll never know she’s a widow maker.
~
I open the door and they were both there
I screamed at them both I was so mad.
A sick feeling, I punched the air,
looking at them barely clad,

I trembled, it's not fair.
I ran from the whore
and ran from you
out the door
losing
you.

Author notes

Etheree
Double Etheree syllable count: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 10, 9, 8, 7, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1

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1 - 21 of 21

By me, right now

Adding your comment:
jadeangyal
October 21, 2008

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Love the poem, the style, and the rhyme. I visit your page every time I want to try something new.
MaMa-2-be-Cindy
February 4, 2008

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This is an great write Amera. Shows the style so very well but says so much at the same time

Cindy
CitrineSunrise
October 16, 2007

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This was a wonderful etheree. You obtained the perfect form while delivering a well-crafted message. I also enjoyed the injection of rhyme. I think this was very well done. Thank you for your entry. Peace, Liz
sweetdancer
October 11, 2007

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this is very nice poetry!i love how you put the words into a respectful piece of poetry!to tell you the truth i think this is one of the best poems here on allpoetry!well i have to go!always do your best and never give up!

sincerely,
sweetdancer (yasmine)
ps:i like the shape of the poem it must have taken a long time to do it
RatherImaginative
October 9, 2007

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Perfect form and awesome flow, and I really have to commend you for rhyming it so smoothly. I haven't even dared attempt that myself. Excellent expression of the emotions involved in both women. Best of luck to you!
Swan song
October 8, 2007

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This would be a hear breaking thing to see I would throw the guy a nickle and tell him to get a better flavor before I left.
ellipsist
October 7, 2007
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love the different points of view
perspectives presented...
And Hyetal
October 7, 2007

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I love how you interchanged between the guy and girl... This was beautiful with a heartbreaking end... Even though she cheated on him, he still loves her, "and ran from you out the door losing you." You have the best endings to your poems.

Always,
Cassie
second-born
October 6, 2007

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wow...this was such a beautiful write...strong emotions of the one who was fooled were very evident...a very powerful double etheree!!! loved it so much...
bedovich
October 5, 2007

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wowwwwwwwwwwwwwww sis i misss your writes alotttt this is greattttttttttt you should teach me new stuff
Desire
October 4, 2007

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Wow!!
Powerful piece penned and what a Magnificent Etheree You have done...I mean...Double Etheree

What emotion!! Love this Beautiful
Presentation spectacular
Thank You for sharing Your Talent!!
Love it!!
Best wishes to You in the contest
Many blessings too
and much love~ Desire~*~
sunny day
October 4, 2007

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You have outdone yourself in this one. Not just one perfect triangle, the mirrored image beneath it to boot. Subject, style, form, nothing keeps you from producing works of the highest quality. Brilliant imagery and the flow was as smooth as a baby's bare bottom. You even added rhyming to this form which was an extra bonus. There seems to be nothing you can't do when it comes to form poetry and I was left in awe of this one. Thank you for sharing your wonderful gift with all of us once again and best wishes in the contest. You make it look so easy. Love you my friend, Joyce
misticmoonlite
October 4, 2007
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ohhh this is excellent ,great poetic form,good luck in the contest,MM
seamaiden
October 4, 2007

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I fully agree with Arzab on both the sadness and the fact of not liking cheaters. They are low and take away your trust in others. Trust is something earned and when the heart is given unconditionally it causes that pain of which you spoke. It's a shattering effect to think that one who you gave totally of yourself could do that to you. I like this form very much and you filled this write with so much imagery. Good luck in the contest with this. Keep writing poet. seamaiden ♥
HaleyMary
October 4, 2007

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This is such a sad write. I don't like cheaters. I think they are one of the lowest kinds of people in society, next to the abusers and murderers. The feeling of heart break was powerful in this piece. Best of luck to you in the contest.
jo-el
October 4, 2007

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hmm...you told a story that can never end pleasantly. yeah...cheaters are the worst. the style lends itself well to the write as it sorta builds on the way to the climax and then counts down towards the sad conclusion. lots of feeling in this. nice
PerVirtuous
October 4, 2007
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Powerful and descrptive. Quite a usage of the form. Should crush in this contest.
StarEyes
October 4, 2007

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Good Morning Miss Form Queen....

First let me ask, is there no form that don't use, and on any subject? WOW! Girl, I see more forms and on subjects I never thought I would when I visit your page.

What a great read this one is! I love it!

Best of luck in this contest!!!!!

and much love

Nyetta
Silent Cougar
October 4, 2007

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The form queen strikes again...

seems a little cold in there, no wonder you went for the door. Very harrowing write indeed, well done you.
Moons Lunar Angel
October 4, 2007
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Very different piece, I liked it.
Tarja
October 4, 2007

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This was a strange piece... I'm a little lost ... at what exactly is going on in it.. but I did enjoy how passionate and ... somewhat... crude you were The whole "whore" but took me by surprise. Nicely done.