The stream of all my consciousness flows by,
A-gliding on the riverbed of time,
That awesome force by which we live and die,
From which we often fall, but always climb.
Distortions tickle me and make me wince--
"If only this one point in time could last!"
Or, "How I wish I could relive the past!"
But oh! my prayers stay unanswered since.
For time does not respond to anyone,
And is the mastermind when days are done.
Author notes
trick
not my best. ahh!
A contest entry
- Short Poems by Pollycheck.
450 points, ended May 26, 2008, 179 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Thank you for entering my short poems contest. You should never put your own poetry down. How can you expect other people to like something that you don't like.
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commendable
I see from your notes that you feel this is not your best. That's intriguing because I feel that this poem is quite good already. I see some roughness, but I think it's mainly my reaction to the changing rhyme scheme. I feel going ABAB then CDDC, threw me off. It goes a bit bumpy with regards to that. Otherwise, I like it. It's a "true" little poem. Regardless of anything else I agree with your sentiment.
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