Hello
The air was still as he approached
The mood of lordliness hung silently
As the vibrating floor
Sang from thousands of footsteps
Cascading applause
Echoed between empty ears
As Nevermind polluted the air
Their hero played the sound of Seattle
As heads banging to his ridged rhyme of contempt
This a sense that smells like teen spirit
Hey Mosquito with a big Libido
Entertain us Mulatto
Evan us Albino
Hey wait, comes as you are
Here lies Mosquito’s Libido
Loaded his gun, not in fun
Had no fun to lose
Tired of pretending
Overboard, he’s assured
He knew, he new
A dirty word
Suicide
A contest entry
- Actors Do It On The Stage! by MessOfADreamer.
300 points, ended September 23, 2008, 3 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Concert (prewrites welcome) by Danna Hobart.
400 points, ended March 2, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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This is impressive. Thank you for entering.
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you describe things so well. brilliant. i like the setting and the story line. this is most unique.
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Sometimes such a dirty word and then again sometimes a welcomed word Joe
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Do you think he finally found Nirvana? So sad that there a people who feel so much misery in their lives. It almost seems that the brighter their minds the more agony they feel. I wonder if you could ask him, if he would say "Nevermind" I really didn't want to die today? Suicide is NOT the answer! Great write!
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Very well done. Reminds me kinda of one I wrote titled, 'Call Me Tomorrow'.. somehow, although they are about two entirely different subject matters. I would love to know if you agree. Thank you again for adding me as one of your favorites.. I will return.. aloha..;-)
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very good
you really captured what could have possibly been going through kurt cobain's mind in his last moments. i've always been a fan of his music and was stunned when he took his life. A fine tribute poem to him.
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I really liked this, good choice of words. hope to see more from you.
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Joe,
What a read this one is! I love it. it may be a sad subject, but well said, and makes one think..... Thanks for sharing this one!
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nice... very good write!
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Very vivid write -- very sad subject. Well done.
Lady D
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excellent
Joe this is awesome. It is sad that some come to know that dirty word. cascading applause echo between empty ears, sad when the world will cheer you and no one knows how empty somebody truly is out of the greed to fill their own desires.
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This has...
a Nirvana concert (ie: Curt Cobaine) all over it. I am a fan and I knew where this was headed as "Nevermind" polluted the air. What a sad ending for a great talent. I really think you created an excellent piece here. And the form is awfully cool, too... Ithica
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suicide is a very dirty word and something that i wish did not exist. thank you for sharing your talent with me today and i am looking forward to reading more from you in the near future. viyanna rosemarie
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