As my kisses fell softly
from the sky
filling streams, rolling rivers.
We swam in loves' lake
my liquid arms caressing you.
Cool teal waters flowing
over intimate parts.
Drowning out ebony sorrows
of your broken hearts.
Passion dancing upon life’s ocean
our bodies ebbing like
divagated waves.
My love for you is saved.
Raining whispered promises
divine words riding the gale.
Our love locked within
the tempest.
Until infinity is revealed.
I love you
from the sky
filling streams, rolling rivers.
We swam in loves' lake
my liquid arms caressing you.
Cool teal waters flowing
over intimate parts.
Drowning out ebony sorrows
of your broken hearts.
Passion dancing upon life’s ocean
our bodies ebbing like
divagated waves.
My love for you is saved.
Raining whispered promises
divine words riding the gale.
Our love locked within
the tempest.
Until infinity is revealed.
I love you
Author notes
"age is just a number"
Picture title: Romantic Day
Artist: Jim Warren
A contest entry
- a poem about me or about my secret love by fading memories.
350 points, ended October 12, 2007, 3 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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Fantastic Novy
True love is infinite, it never dies, just as the waves on the ocean roll forever, and so do the clouds in the sky. Your imagery is so wonderful, it captures me and keeps me, I can't get away.
I will love you infinitly,
Brazos

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Hey ma, you sure can take a picture and just illustrate with so much beauty. And without seeing it. The picture comes to life. Such a well written piece. ~ Mykeee


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Beautiful
This is a beautiful piece, you have down a great job here and I love your use of metaphors and the picture is just the icing on the cake, you had me from the start you know my love for water, excellent write, thank you for sharing and keep them coming.
raingoddess

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How lovely, so soft and sensuous,
delicate and pretty..that and much more,
and what love should be.
I adore this!
~Pastel

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Love's lake needs the apostrophe.
You have created a beautiful image. There is a caress hidden in each sentence. You raise questions in my mind that I think you assume I have answers for. Why does he have a broken heart and why should I care? why, if you love me, must your love be saved? I raise these because while your language and imagery asked me to sink into the poem and the way you had it phrased led me into the poem, these fragments pulled me back and I resented them
For me, some of the hardest things are maintaining focus (I never met a tangent I didn't find enchanting); not giving the reader more info than needed ( but that is not the whole story); trusting the reader to see as close to the truth as possible (I am always having to see when I am over telling as a form of control). There are more. I have many bad habits
But I thought you would like to see some of the things I watch out for when writing. You know I would say nothing if I did not care about you being excellent or if I thought you could do no better.
Love, Tom B.

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tomisb
It was written with two concepts in mind, one was to capture reader & pull them in. The other was to show the sadness & rasie questions in the minds of poets. Thank you for expressing your views and finds so vividly. This was a lesson for me as well........Novy
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But a small gift from me for all the joy you have brought to my life. May my little insights be seeded to fruited trees.

Love, Tom B. -
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Thanks Tom;
I always learn something everyday and today you gave a good lesson...A Tree grows.....love, Novy
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Fantastic
reading every word of this i could imagine amy in some way. very amazing write my friend and good luck in my contest

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Cool teal waters flowing
over intimate parts.
Drowning out ebony sorrows
of your broken hearts.
The whole write is brilliant these lines I truly adored. The images and words flowed well. I love the picture it was amazing.
Brilliant and endearing to the heart.
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brilliant
oh thats so awesome! love the imagery you create through the poem. totaaly loved it! i was hooked from the first line.
great writing!
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Superb Writing
This is stunning writing to be sure. Wonderful imagery here. Love is caught here so wonderfully-well. Your words drew me in and I got lost in this piece. Very very romantic piece indeed.
Wonderful writing novy. :}
Wayne

x


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The imagery you have painted with your words is truly magnificent. The flow is smooth as silk. Very well written. Loved it. Good luck in the contest.


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Truly impressive writing and capturing love so beautifully! This is magnificent. The picture is totally breathtaking and adds to the poem like music does for words. Good luck in the contest!

Ted E

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