Praying for pain that I can feel.
Longing for the burning of broken bones.
I am thankful for the numbness,
That can take away the untraceable ache.
Let the numbness encompass me,
Surround me and overtake me.
Take my will and shatter it,
Take my soul, free it.
Let me be without feeling,
No soul or heart.
No love to disappoint,
No hope to be shattered.
Let the faintest ray of happiness,
Be dashed without care.
Let my inmost feelings be forgotten,
No longer felt.
Let me feel only the numbness,
Which will never give way -
To the burning ache of feeling,
To the unforgiving torture of disappointed hopes,
To the unabashed burning hatred of denied love.
No love, hope, happiness.
No soul, heart, strength.
Broken in all ways -
Better now that I do not feel,
Complete now that I am numb.
Author notes
Weakness is not lack of power
A contest entry
- Broken Stories and Abnormal Cliches by Dirty and Broken.
2400 points, ended November 29, 2007, 26 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The Childrens Cries (Ages 11-15) by Nostalgia.
450 points, ended December 10, 2007, 12 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What do you think?
Comments
1 - 21 of 21
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I really love this;]
You are an amazomg writer.I wish i was as talented as all of these people on this site.
Its amazing.Keep it up!
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hahha thanks so much! that makes me laugh a little because thats what I'm always thinking
oooohhhh dear. talented poets.
*jealousy*
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Numbness is nice for a time...but it only leads to more bad choices and bitterness. It can consume you too completely. I like this because you honestly communicate these emotions that everyone feels from time to time. I can feel the passion behind your words. Thanks for entering and good luck.
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I feel for you
Emotions are a undeniable part of our make-up. I'm sorry you have been so hurt, but without emotion, without tenderness, we can never feel joy, love, and hope! I pray that you will not allow the god of this world to defeat you, enslave you, and ultimately conquer you.
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Numbness does not take away the ache, it merely submerges it. One can learn to find the simple joy of not feeling but it never lasts. Over time we all learn to erect walls to protect us from the pain we feel. You cannot be without feeling, even if that feeling is despair. The main reason to make it through is to show those causing you pain that they cannot conquer you, never let them win.
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emotions,
yea, they are awesome aren't they? don't give up cause you feel, that's what makes us real!
I know it gets unbearable sometimes but write it, vent it, just don't end it!!!
well done, keep your head up. -
To be unaffected can be a bliss and a sorrow. But I have to give you credit for analyzing all the advantages to feeling 'numb'. Something I could relate to
think on it ^^
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what can I say?
I have been where this poem takes me many times and I don't like it anymore.
you'll get through whatever is bothering you and something worse will come.So tighten up your bootstraps and when the crap hits the fan you'll have been screwing with your shoes and the poop might miss you.
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you're young doll
dont give up because you have emotions, being numb is not living you hurt others and after so long you realize you hurt yourself. one day you'll find a reason to be so happy you could never ask for more. this is great and a lot of people can relate to this you're flow is amazing but live on and take it day by day because you'll be someone great because you care. I know you care because if you didnt you wouldnt want pain to disappear you wouldnt feel it and wish you were numb. but one day you'll have a kid or a husband/wife or a dream job maybe evena bestfriend that makes you want to live and happy and you'll know that being numb takes the happiness out of life. dont give up you'll make it darling. amazing poem. or i wouldnt have taken time to write such a long comment =P cause honestly i have written one this long in awhile
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thanks so much for the comment!!
glad that u liked the poem...
I was just really depressed for awhile but Im good now
thnx for your comment!
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Wow, a mistike errie poem, one that makes you get lost in the folds of the rhyme and flow, set your mind wander from the holds of reality, into the piece you wove, beautiful....excellent job, I really enjoyed this piece.
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thanks! yeah.. its one of the more dark pieces that I've ever written..
thanks for the comment!
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Very well written for these contests, an excellently done and flowing poem. Well done here, good job and good luck...Scott
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Very intriguing piece. Good luck in contests.
Nicely penned
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Thanks for the comment!
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Thanks for entering my contest. This was actually pretty good.
..Simply Me♥ -
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Thanks!
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Guilty ( Everybody"s Guilty)
Thanks for entering my contest< I will be commenting when it is over. Good Luck! -
this was completely amazing! (i seem to use that word a lot. XP) and i think its one of my favorites so far!! good luck in the contest!!
~Tangible. -
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Thanks!!
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