There is a girl who drifts
In the shadows of ghosts
Only to be seen
Like a mirage in a dream
By nobody, but me.
Courted by
Death on her left
And
Life on her right,
She graces a line
Not many would dare.
When the sharp sage green
Of her eyes and mine meet
I can see the gnosis
Of world's untold
Buried deep.
Why me she haunts,
I wish I could say,
But her secrets
Are her's to keep.
If I stare into the night
Avoiding all light
To her chthonic dwelling
She sends me.
Pull me away to the
Gloaming twilight
You call Your home.
There I will sleep
'Till you call upon me
My soul you can keep
As your own.
Black Majic Love
Your spell I am under
This voodoo
Makes me yours
This voodoo
Makes me yours.....
Author notes
a revisitation of "black magic love".... same girl, same concept, same speaker.... completely different poem.... difrerent style... better i think, read both if you will tell me your favorite
Option 2 for the contest by immortal
- Comments for All group list • next in list
A contest entry
- Wicked Games and Lithium Dreams [18+] by Immortal Obscurity.
900 points, ended October 19, 2007, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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well now im trying to figure something out lol it's got me kind of stumped her your title says "black majic love" yet in your author notes it says "black magic love" i find it a good poem dont get me wrong however i would like to know which one it is magic or majic
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dark amazin words i luv the black magic in all of this u seem a temptress in all of this poetry
good luck 2 ya abe
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Well.. good luck in the contest.. I personally didn't enjoy this because ... well I didn't like the structure and I'm just not a fan of voodoo inspired stuff... it's usually all cliche and overdone.. if it's really REALLY good I will enjoy it but this lacks creativity...
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"This voodoo makes me yours..."
The repetition of that phrase was very effective. It added a special sort of creepiness to the entire work. Very well done, and good luck to you.
L.
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Loved the structure
it made you slow down in parts in reading this, sort of halted the rhythym, liked that. Loved your original style and words (chthonic) - 'gloaming twilight', 'black Majic' and the meaning of course within the text. I could picture this almost ethereal person standing almost in the shadows, great use of title. Great revisit and rework, Lib x
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i like this one better, it is easier for me to understand and i like the details you put into it..... (i'm trying to sound professional for once)...
..... what is up with you and voodoo magic lately??? i think that ive seen it mentioned a couple of times in some of your poems.....
what does gnosis mean? I tried looking it up, but there was no definition.
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