And so...here I stand...again
Watching as splinters of my core,
Prick and harass the ruddy skin of your feet.
Tear drops streaking my pallid cheeks;
Seem to escape the swell tide in my eyes.
Once again the jester's garments fit precisely to my physique,
Exposing me for the fool that I am.
Hasty and hankering for another chance to impart to you this fragile heart...
Never remembering that in this epilogue,
'Tis I who will fall prey to the hegemony of grief.
Yet...ah yes...I must know that you want me.
Tis a compulsion that I use to piece back together these minute
Figments of my heart...never bearing in mind that the majority of it,
Is wedged in each imprint of your feet.
I smell the enthralling perfume of your desire...
I taste the alluring sugar coated words that blooms from that pink flower in your Mouth, To only spill from the silk petals of your lips and,
Finally becoming as sweet as nectar to my ears.
Words that become the last flower to the Humming bird...my only hope.
I am battling with my lust and my precedent anguish...
Which path is my heart strong enough to take?
I am willing to gamble but I am afraid that my compulsion will never be able
To savage the debris of my heart once more,
If I were to take another attack head on.
Tis a risk I will take...
For temptation is the captain of my heart...
And you are the sea that I long to set sail upon...
I will set my course and ride the waves...
And I beg you, my Obsidian, to not condemn this heart to its watery grave....
A contest entry
- AllPoetry Extravaganza--3 Month Gold and Silver Membership by Violet Moodswing.
1500 points, ended November 28, 2007, 67 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give me lots of imagery! 5 Optionssss; for everyone by perfectsunset.
450 points, ended October 3, 2007, 24 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Your Best Prewritten Poem by Aralyn Leighanna.
330 points, ended October 2, 2007, 11 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Poetry only by Dahlia Tremaine.
425 points, ended April 1, 2008, 27 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - round one; your best prewrite. by August Starlight.
765 points, ended March 21, 93 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
I tried...lol the prompt: Temptation [option 3] "The night was young, as were we. Loving in bliss under the willow tree."
Comments
1 - 38 of 38
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I love this.
You kept me reading and your word choice and imagery completely drew me in.
I like that word, pallid. I don't see many people use it anymore.
Thanks for entering and good luck.
By the way... I don't applaud just any poem.
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I find it a privillege and a honor that you have given me applauds and a wonderfully inspiring critique. I'm glad you've enjoyed this poem, truthfully its one that I am proud to have written. Thank you, thank you thank you.
Oh...and I love the word pallid...pale and white are too commonly used...pallid isn't lol.
Kylaya
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Simply Amazing!!!!
This poem is absolutely beautiful and it has captured me with the meaning of your heart's desiere. To give love and have love in return. You did a fabulous job with this beautiful poem. I love it. Congratulations on winning the gold with it. Anyone who wouldn't give you gold for this mustn't know reall poetry. God bless you always and keep up the amazing work.
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sorry i commented it so many times. my computer messed up and did it.
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lol thank you! And tell your computer I said thanks as well lol
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Great
I really like the way you worded the whole poem. So detailed and realistic. Good Write!! -
Great
I really like the way you worded the whole poem. So detailed and realistic. Good Write!! -
I taste the alluring sugar coated words that blooms from that pink flower in your Mouth, To only spill from the silk petals of your lips and,
Finally becoming as sweet as nectar to my ears.
This is one of the best writes I have read in a long while. Very good job... I'm impressed!!!!
/q-pid/
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wow thank you! I'm glad you find it that high up on the scale for you. Im gratful for the read.
Desir~
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The choice of the words in this poem fascinated me.
This stanza charmed for its beauty of expression...
'I smell the enthralling perfume of your desire
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Words that become the last word to the humming bird...my only hope.'
The poem has its sensual touch...here and there...creating a sweet sensation on one's body...without offending anyone
The images are nicely handled...and add to the overall impression.
It's a poem worth reading several times.
Thank you, dear.
Galaxy2
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I thank you kindly for your comments and for taking the time to read my piece. Out of all I'd say this is my favorite so far from what I composed. You've really encouraged me greatly by simply reading. Thank you again.
Ana -
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Hey hey...you're encouraging me to kiss you all over....I won't mind that though...lol
Thank you...You're so sweet!
Galaxy2 -
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LOl didn;t know I had that affect on people. helps to know lol. you're welcome
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this is by far one of the best poems i have read today..
how could you say you tried??
even though i think love is too realistic its a really good poem!
great job
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Well done
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Awww this is so very lovely
I can clearly see why you won the Gold...
You done such a wonderful job with these precious words. This may be the best piece I read so far today.
loveandblessings2u & yours always
Joyce
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You tried??????????????????????????.............
This is beautiful and well written.your choice of words is amazing. I like the begginging with the splinters of my core, that is so.........hmmm....wow.!!!!!!!
I also like talking about the jesters garments. This is beautiful, even though it is kinda sad.
Great Title as well, very descriptive. -
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Thank you for your encouraging words! I'm honored that you enjoyed my piece and hope that it lingers with you as it has with me. Out of all my poems, its my avorite because I felt as if it was the day my MUSE was on full duty lol. thank you once again.
Desir...
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Wow.. Very well done. Great usage of the prompt. Very descriptive and imaginative. It paints a picture as one reads. Very well done. Keep up the good work and good luck in the contest
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Oh my, this was simply amazing!! The flow of the poem goes so smoothly and really shows the confusion and battle within this person. Deciding upon such things is often so hard for any person, and I think that is why this piece can speak so forcefully. You did an amazing job with this.
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Ah, thank you I'm glad you enjoyed it. Yes I tried to incoporate the internal self conflict and I'm glad to see that I have accomplished that. Thank you for the comment and the encouragment.
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sounds kinda rough i think
however i do like the imagery -
I would like to thank you for sharing this beautiful piece, my favorite lines were
"Once again the jester's garments fit precisely to my physique,
Exposing me for the fool that I am..."
Brilliant use of jesters garments, very, very original!
Thank you for entering!
Live and Let Live,
Aralyn -
Lovely, but no poetry terms built in... as contest requires.
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Beautiful!
I can see, smell, and taste the words in this. It forms such beautiful pictures in my mind, like one a painting would portray. These lines were so wonderfully done I was really drawn in by this "I smell the enthralling perfume of your desire...
I taste the alluring sugar coated words that blooms from that pink flower in your Mouth, To only spill from the silk petals of your lips and,
Finally becoming as sweet as nectar to my ears.
Words that become the last flower to the Humming bird...my only hope." It was just so beautiful, bursting with imagery & love. Lovely write! Best of luck in my contest -
Very beautiful and wonderfuly written.
Well done. A fine example of awsome poetry.
~K~ -
sorry didn't mean to forget applause
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I smell the enthralling perfume of your desire...
I taste the alluring sugar coated words that blooms from that pink flower in your Mouth, To only spill from the silk petals of your lips and,
Finally becoming as sweet as nectar to my ears.
Words that become the last flower to the Humming bird...my only hope
That is my fav stanza, but the entire piece, awesome.
Very strong imagery, which for me is the best part of a poem
Good Luck Dolls -
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thank you hun...I tried to pack as much Imagery and Metaphors into this bad boty as possible 
). glad you loved it and thank you for the support!
(ah my back lol)
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I really like this.
I, apparently, entered the same contest.
Eh... after reading this, I don't hink I have a chance.
You've done a damn good job of this.
Good metephores.
Great imagery.
Beautiful.
Well done.
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don't say that lol. i'm not the one judging...maybe yours will get picked over mine. But thank you again for reading my poetry. makes me feel warm inside 
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Well done - the words chosen is perfect for the theme of your poem. I loved the imagery and the inner war manifested for all your readers to see. You might want to have a look at the spelling of some words though as it detracts from an otherwise gorgeous piece. I loved this. Good luck in the contest.
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ok and thank you for reading and the advice...I will look into it. Thanks again!
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Beautifully done. The imagery has strength and the flows adds alot to this piece as well. Nicely penned.
Much luck
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flowing beauty in your words,
then you cut us in half with your final stanza, I'm
sure some of us headed to our windows to shoot a flare
up into the air.....it left us feel "at risk" not sure
if it is wonderfully so, so look north shot a flare gun,
nope, that's not the north star?
Wonderful poem, great imagination and flow.
ears2hearyou
Kathleen
and you are right temptation has many risks, and then
of course, some rewards, the balance of which is it?
and was it really worth it? good job!
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thank you thank you thank you...lol I was hoping this was good enough for the contest. Tried hard on this one. And I must be honest, the last stanza is my fav. I was looking for the right metaphor to create the standing ovation feel. guess I got it lol. I appreciate you reading this and I thank you for the appluas...its very inspiring to know that someone finds your work interesting enough to simply read...much less comment.
thanks again...
K.V
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wow!!! fantastic!!!
i would like to congratulate you on a very well written poem and to wish you well in this contest thaet you have entered. i am looking forward to reading more from you in the near future. viyanna rosemarie -
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Oh thank you very much for reading it and for your well wishes. I'm happy that you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it. I will most definitly return the favor.
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