It crawls through the system working its way up
- my spine, I turn - a whisper against my ear
I can feel the hot breath against the back of my neck
The world is spinning, my vision blurring - no longer clear
Movement, I turn to follow
catch what is circling, hunting, surrounding
- me, again the voices, the whisper, fingers closing upon my wrist
I open my mouth to cry out- my breath quick, head pounding
"Very up to see pray are you lite to flew"
"Were three kite blue hunter fin he do"
Spiral out, see the motion, but not the action
panic settling, losing grip
Out of control, cannot process words, no thoughts, unclear
Jerk of arm, stillness invading, body shutting down,
lost inside the part of mind where it is lunacy where I drown
Author notes
Option 7 -
One of my very close friends is living with schizophrenia, so I took what he has told me and worked it into this...
The quoted part is actual things he has said during one of his episodes...It is schizophasia or 'word salad' - I thought that it would add to the writing to see a literal representation of something to do with the disease; if you would like to know more about it...Please let me know and I can tell you as much as I can.
A contest entry
- In the Life of Insanity. by AutumnsFlame.
757 points, ended November 3, 2007, 18 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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this is one awsum piece..loved it
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It's always really difficult to encapsulate mental disorders into words, and I'd say this would be the most trying subject matter. You've done it very eloquently though, I love it.
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OH--- also I would like to thank you for not entering a prewrite... like every entry in my contest was a prewrite.
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Wow.... I thought this perfectly captured the disease, though your sylabols were kinda off that didn't matter. I know where your coming from, dude, my girlfriend's schizophrenic... Thank you for entering my contest and good luck.
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Thanks, I try to enter new pieces even if it says prewrites are allowed. Um, yeah my friend struggles with schizophrenia pretty regularly if he is not taking medication on a schedule (which he should be but sometimes neglects to do so) From what I understand, he does not have a certain subtype because a lot of his symptoms fit into paranoid schizophrenia and catatonic schizophrenia. I really just took what he said and sort of tried to make it work into poetry. Thanks for the comments.
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