If I had a million big ones
yes a million buckaroos
the first thing I would do
is buy myself some fuckin' shoes
and then I'd buy a bunch of cheez-its
oh about a years supply
I would need them when I'm munchin'
from my million dollar high
I'd then buy myself a segway scooter
and scooter all around the city
and I would smile all the while
cuz life it wouldn't so be shitty
then I'd pull a Captain Planet
and pay for a solution to pollution
and then to Mr.Ron Paul
I'd make a campaign contribution
and next I would do something
that would make me smile ear to ear
and I'd buy several hundred pairs of socks
one for each day of the year
then I would sit down on the toilet
and do something I've never down
and wipe my ass with a Franklin
just to have some fuckin' fun
and in the end with what is left
once I've gave what I'll give
I'd would look for and I'd find
the place I'd like to live.
A contest entry
- If I had a million dollars... by Lady Christian.
800 points, ended October 17, 2007, 6 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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This is a well written, humorous piece.
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i love your style and your poems make me smile.
happy 420
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I wish Ron Paul were president. I love that man.
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another funny one
I like your style. Just watch the spelling.
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dude i like you i was in shitty mood when i got on here and you have made me laugh twice now and my spirits have lifted, thank you i will be back to read more for sure
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Funny.
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A very cool little ditty you have penned here! Other than the sock thing mine would be similar lol. Best wishes to you in the contest!
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i love captain planet
I've actually known a millionare who admitted to wiping his ass with 100 dollar bills. (not to mention scored some rolled up in my pockets from the night before)
How have you been old friend? Your poetry still makes me laugh like hell, and I always happen to read it while burning. Hey, but guess what? I grow the crippest herb now!!
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10
I love this poem! it is fricken awesome!
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10
if i had a million dollars i would buy you!!! omg i think i just found the love of my life...
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This was very funny indeed. I think I like the part best were you wiped your ass with Ben Franklins face. BUT What did Ben ever do to you? I mean he invented a lot of things...lol. J/k. I know it was the concept of you wiping your ass with money because the government has made this little green piece of paper so IMPORTANT when all it really is...is paper. I think YOU got the idea of the ENTIRE contest with those lines. The only thing is...I require 35 lines minimum to be eligible to win. PLEASE add some more lines to this and it is a shoe in for being a finalist. Nice rhyming too btw.
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hahha niice niice i would do the same thing
catt~
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awesome. id do the same thing!
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this had me laughing all the way to the end. i love it!!
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aww.. me too...
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Very interesting take on the prompt. Nice rhyme and rhythm. Good luck in the contest.
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A very interesting poem! I think you did a good job on this, so I'd like to wish you the best of luck in the "If I had a million dollars..." contest
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