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Sea Thoughts

Sea Thoughts

By: Mrs. Lady Enthralling

 

 

As you ride around

In the fresh brand new scent

Of my water

Thoughts of Thunder Bay make me feel low

As I hold my head down in shame.

Weeping in to a lonely desire of writers block

Scratching the nappy roots of my dread locks.

Shocked that you smiled at me

As I drain my hair

Of after birth of going berserk.

Not knowing what direction

That leads to indiscretion,

Meditation,

Stimulation,

Vacation,

In to the mountain lows

of my suggested say so.

Snatch up my taxes

releasing my hard earn working money

Of my pay so’ s.

Geico cant give you no discount on my insurance

As I speak

You can receive my mind state is ruined.

From influence of a bad card deal called

Satan’s life.

He car jacked my soul

Made me in to the state of mind

Of Seizers.

I need a breather

To be a soul survivor

Extant in

My own heat climates of

Cubic zirconium diamonds

To see the war is inside my head

Games of falling and rising stars

To show Who the real snakes crawling around.

Find my common ground

On when I get down

I let my voice cry flames of

Shooting bullet range

As my pain creep in creeks

Of

 

 

M

Y

 

 

S

E

A

 

 

T

H

O

U

G

H

T

S

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© Julia L. Clark Registration Number Txu 1 - 259- 764, All rights reserved

Author notes

Sea Thoughts is a spoken word piece
that I will perform next week I want
to start remebering it now as I am not one to perform
with a paper in my hand if your not in to spoken
word you must get in to it as its such a deeper
form of expression "POETRY" on another level
I am versatile I can hit you with anything
Mrs. Enthralling

In a list

A contest entry

Sea Thoughts _ Spoken Word

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression? Line numbers
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?) (Line numbers)

Comments

1 - 34 of 34
  • poetisi
    July 22

    Edit | Reply
    Hi Julia,
    I am new to the site and very impressed by your work. This is excellent. Once I get my poetry posted, I would encourage your input. Brand

  • Swangrnv
    April 9
    Edit | Reply

    oooooo...

    ...yeah yeah! on point!
    I like this! good work lady!


  • Lyrical Rain
    February 23

    Edit | Reply
    The water is what got me so into this poem. The way its used as a metaphor is beautiful. I love the way you've expressed so many different things in this one poem. I give you your props for this poem.

  • WiseWithWordz
    February 19

    Edit | Reply
    this piece is crazy hot! excuse the lingo...lol. i loved your flow, i could hear it though your voice was not on. this piece talked to me. loved it. i need to check you out more often. you will do well at any slam if you attack the stage and mic the way these words attacked my soul. bravo lay!


  • robert bolin
    February 13

    Edit | Reply
    I love the power and the conviction
    You bring out in this write,
    It's very edgy and powerful
    Thank you for allowing me to read and comment
    On your work.


  • johnswails
    February 13

    Edit | Reply

    Exellent flow

    Nicely penned. the metaphor of water went so well with the thoughts you were expressing and of course, I love Spoken Word so that was a beney!

    Thanks for sharing.

    We have started a forum in the group where we help build our craft. Stop by and leave a comment.

    One Love,

    John

  • moluv10
    January 24
    Edit | Reply
    This is beautiful! I'd love to hear it spoken out loud. you're very talented.

    • thank you LUV this is my favrite type of writing
      I peform spoken word so its my fav thanks again
      muah....

  • sassylilpoet gold member
    December 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Absolutely Beautiful, Love...

    I have read this twice, this, I must say is one of my favorites, by far. Full of blount, raw, emotions and just enough humor to make the reader smile. " Snatch up my taxes releasing my hard earned working money of my Pay so's...Geico can't give you no discount on my insurance as I speak you can recieved my mind sate is ruined from influence of abad card deal called Satan's life, he car jacked my soul"
    Girl, I don't know where you found all these thoughts, but they just tumbled about, one after the other. This is the best writing I have read on here in quite some time. I hope you get that much needed vacation

    Lovely, keep the words flowing
    I have bookmarked this piece
    Many Blessings to you,
    Sincerely,
    Sassy


  • pania gold member
    December 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I had to read this aloud, and boy, it packs a punch! Awesome, images falling over each other in their haste to be heard. I'm sure the performance is amazing - can you record this and put it on the site as spoken? I am sure your voice, becaus it was written by your voice, would add even more dimensions to the piece. Best wished from a fellow Gemini, fellow woman and fellow poet.


    • Mrs LadyEnthralling silver member
      December 13, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      lol thanks artist i am a spoken word artist as well when i get the chance may add a video are something doing the piece thanks


  • darell
    October 25, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    A drifting memory...

    This poem read like a drifting memory of reflections.
    Life is a collection of experiences. Some good and
    some not so good. Together they form us into
    the people we are and will grow to be.
    A poignant piece that flows nicely and leaves
    the reader in a state of contemplation

    I commented on this poem previously
    but had to do it again because as I
    reread it still felt fresh
  • almostgone
    October 22, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Very lovely hon. I wish you well on stage. Im sure you will get a great response from this piece!


  • Rhyming From Rehab gold member
    October 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    this is very lovely, and I really love the wording/language you used in this. Very expressive and moving, thank you for sharing, and I wish you all the best in the contest ~blessings always~

  • LeanneBridgewater
    October 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    bravo

    this is a definete expressionate piece.. very naturous but still locks in a working flow like 'the nappy roots of my dreadlocks'

    you use words good - i like the exchange of them.. like how you put creep in creeks which strengthened the ee sound

    the piece is of an intesresting subject and doesn't limit an audience which is good news

    good luck with the performing.. i agree with your authors notes.. i bet the performance will go great!
    good luck in the contest and ta for entering!
    night night

  • sweetdancer
    October 10, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    wow! this is a great poem!i love the words you put in such a poem!i think this is one of the best poems here on allpoetry!well great job!always do your best,and never give up!

    sincerely,
    sweetdancer (yasmine)

  • Ephiphany
    October 9, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Commenting again for the group


  • Rememberance
    September 30, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful and moving. Wonderfully written.

  • Silvos. silver member
    September 29, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    A W E S O M E

    Beautifully written as always. I love it.


  • kennethlaney
    September 26, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Pretty good

    I like the Line on "GEICO"! ALWAYS MAKES ME THINK OF THE LIZARD. (WANT SOME lizard baby?)
    I always wake up a little discombobulated,(A LITTLE CRAZY AND CONFUSSED)

  • mrajarams
    September 25, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I appreciate the greatness of this work. It has dwelled upon the deep senses and has been a wonderful treat to read. Keep it up. Keep creating such fascinating beaches for us to swing and swim. Great work dear.

  • Ephiphany
    September 24, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    I think this is lovely and deep

    my beautiful sister. Spoken word poetry is something to experience as you stated in your Notes. I applaud all the time and effort you put forth in this journey. I think you will do wonderful...wish I could hear you all the same perform this piece. Deep emotions continously ride through this. Great job, keep going, as far as you want to in life. I shall find you to do extremely well with this.

    e


  • darell
    September 24, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Outstanding!!!

    Baby this was an incredible piece.
    It's really hard to put into words but
    you really came from down deep on this one.
    I can hear rage and the call for help in this poem.
    You are at the crossroads of your life and
    I believe you are ready for some significant changes.
    I applaud your candor and transparency.
    You always give us your complete self.
    I love you so much for that. This is a masterpiee!
    Beautiful! Lovely! Incredible! Outstanding!


    • Mrs LadyEnthralling silver member
      September 24, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      its my favorite honey woo thanks i really like this is not a many poems are spoken word pieces i write that i like but i love this one
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