The Ballad of Tillie Tooter ...

Tillie lived in North Hollywood,
her age was eighty plus three.
Tillie was a Floridian
and stout as you will see.
One early morn she headed out,
hours before sunrise,
Driving along her car was hit
up on five-ninety-five.
There were two who witnessed that scene,
both had called nine-one-one,
But rescuers failed to spot her
and left, thinking they were done!

Her car had flown for forty feet,
downward, off of a bridge,
Willow trees helped cushion the fall,
a swamp became the wedge.
She raged and screamed, then she prayed -
but not one would answer her call.
Suspended she hung for three long days
with snakes and bugs and all.
A thoroughly "modern Tillie",
had a cell phone that could not be found,
For it had dislodged on impact,
while she dangled upside-down!

When she got hot and thirsty,
it didn't take her long to discover
She was able to salvage rain water
from inside her steering wheel cover!
Trapped and hungry she hung there,
itching from insect bites,
Wondering if someone would come there
before she would die of fright!
Finally! someone noticed her car
as they collected the trash,
Fire and rescue rushed to the site
and found Tillie with nary a gash!

Tillie was glad to see them,
glad that they didn't bring a hearse,
As they wheeled her on a stretcher,
her only request was ~ her purse;
It too was lost in the jumble,
somewhere up under the dash
And until she got her purse in hand,
she'd not have any cash.
Her body still itchy from hundreds of bites,
a purple bruise gracing her head.
As Broward General released her -
she had visions of her bed;

The newsmen wanted a statement -
hounding, with usual guile,
"I'm a survivor" was all she said,
quick as a wink with a smile!
Caught in a bad situation
and doing the best that she could,
Tillie Tooter became a legend
and a 'Star' from Hollywood!





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