tainted enigmatic riddler
you shadow yourself in empty words
and wrap your heart in sheets of paper
to hide it from prying eyes.
alphabetic codes fragmentize a trail
to the wizard behind the curtain...
you are the jagged lightning in our stormy skies,
beautifully destructive...
electrifying.
mischievious angel
you ripped off your wings and burned them,
dancing as the flames kissed your forsaken feathers.
corrupted joker
doesn't the king dance for your amusement now?
the marionette in the jester's depraved puppet show.
the skulls of your indiscretions
laugh cruelly at the feeble attempts to understand you,
befriend you,
care for you.
pills filled with the darkest fairy glitter
scattered on the floor:
the only echoes, whispers, fading glimpses
of a life that once occupied the dusty rusted space.
still, undeciphered puzzles linger in your fading presence,
toying with the minds of those who seek you,
a game as dark and twisted as your own mind.
Author notes
You! You know this is for you.
Pic: Silent Jester by MantraV on DeviantArt
SpydurPoet
(Jessi)
I wanna be your Auntie
I am 25, from Texas, I like poetry, photography, studying anything and everything, gardening, crafts, etc.
A contest entry
- The Show Must Go On Round 1 of 5 by Willowhaunt.
450 points, ended September 28, 2007, 22 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I Want The Best Of AP by AllHopeIsEclipsed555.
510 points, ended October 13, 2007, 10 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - prompts & more prompts. by TChaplinette.
450 points, ended August 15, 2008, 28 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 45 of 45
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the depth of this ridler for me is not to hard to see but i take a glance and lift the romance to say that i loved your poem....great woork i bow to the master
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A poem of allusions, where the tone hints more to a meaning than the actual meaning. This would be great read aloud, a monologue, an introduction to an opening scene, the style is dramatic but fluid and of course with a measure of despair. The color font (orange) fits for it could be read as a Halloween piece.
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are you poet timespell in disguise...oh my gawd,
the depths of this poem just slayed us in two!
That was truly hellish and fabulous!
you couldn't stop reading it and was breathless
at the end!
well done!
ears/Seattle sis
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welcome to the family aunty
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i LOVED it!!!
i loved the imagery, the mood, i loved all of it.
thank you so much for entering
and good luck.
taylor.
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Intriguing.
alphabetic codes fragmentize a trail
to the wizard behind the curtain...
you are the jagged lightning in our stormy skies,
beautifully destructive...
electrifying.
Wow! These lines were fantastic! Wonderful job and thanks for entering!
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A nice poem that you have written here.
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Wow. I love this poem (as made obvious by the shiny trophy). It's amazing. I'm not even going to PRETEND to know what it's about or what metaphors lay beneath; all I can say is that the words fit so well, the flow is amazing, and you managed to make me fall in love with this joker. THAT takes talent. Extremely well written, and thank you for entering my contest.
Keep Quilling,
Whiskey -
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First of all, thank you for the trophy. I was shocked and amazed about it. It was written for a...friend. I originally wrote him a poem from him poem titles, but it wasn't good enough for him. Hence the elipse. So I wrote this kind of as a sarcastic reply. He loved it. Of course. Oi.
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The language in this is just stunning, as was the imagery and metaphor. However, I don't think the format does it justice. This could be jaw dropping, but at the moment, it is only amazing. The format makes it messy and hard to stay focused. That said, I did enjoy it anyway, and the picture worked rather well. Thank you
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I love the dark and eerie imagery I get from this. I would suggest taking off the picture though, for the imagery I got from this poem is exponentially greater than the picture at the top of the page, which could take away imagery from the reader. It makes it seem as if that's what I am supposed to imagine, but again the image I got from the poem itself is far greater than that of the picture. Excellent! Good luck in the contest!
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oh pooh! it is really good....damn
clearing my throat, big sweet smile upon my face,
(refusing to bow) I say with all humility now,
THAT was A GOLD TROPHY POEM, honest, that wasn't ....
me....who snuck inside your room to prance about, and
deliver beautiful acceptance speechesin your mirror, blushing oh, I glowed ......(lol)
Congratulations, the metaphors are beautiful and it
had a wonderful easy flow, and it even gave me scarey
goosebumps....and pssst...and I did make your bed when
I left!
ears2hearyou
Kathleen
GREAT GREAT WRITE, excellent job, perhaps you should
just drop out of round two? give us all a little break?
didn't think so.....sigh
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Thanks for making my bed -- I'm really bad about remembering to do that before I leave for work.
~*~SP~*~
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Congrats on the gold, My co-weaver!
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Thank you!
::huggles::
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This is a very well crafted piece with great imagery that leaves the reader with a plethory of thoughts.
Great write and congrats on gold.
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Awesome, amazing and fab! Very well done! Good luck in the contest.
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Amazzzing!!!
This was fabulous!!! I thought the imagery in this was hands down some of the best work I've read in a while!!! You led me down a dark and twisted path, and left me standing in the shadows alone and afraid!! Keep them coming!
I stand and applaud you!!
DangerousCereal
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this piece, is full of imagery, the flow is excellent, it's a great read from beginning to end.
great write.
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Hey! Thanks for the comment. It's always nice to see you.
Write on.
~*~SP~*~
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Waahah!!!!!!!That really is something, i love the darkness of the whole thing...amazingm and the picture is really something!! me, being an artist myself more then a poet... i find it great and your poem really adds to it. thanx for sharing.
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Thank you for your comment. Where is your artwork posted? I go to DeviantArt a lot.
Write on!
~*~SP~*~
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"you shadow yourself in empty words
and wrap your heart in sheets of paper
to hide it from prying eyes."
The beginning is great I loved the effortless flow. you seem to be a natural about the calm collection of imagery you have used. basically its awsome well done.
I also look for the endings too and must say I hate a poem that does not sound finnished and well you nailed the ending it rocked!
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Thank you for your awesome comment. Actually, endings are what I have the biggest problem with. They usually take me twice as long to write as the rest of the poem.
Write on!
~*~SP~*~
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AWESOME! very intense imagery and good word choice
rock on girl
--canvas
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Thanks for your comment!
Write on.
~*~SP~*~
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Others have seen this as dark but I just find it full of truth. I particulary enjoyed the first few lines that created a character of such hidden complexity. Oh, that I could/should/would write like this. Congratulations, commendations and adulatations.
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Thank you for your wonderful comment. And you are right. It is full of truth. The person that I wrote this about shields himself in layers of riddles and puzzles to deflect any kind of attachment.
Write on!
~*~SP~*~
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wicked
What a great write ..you pul the reader along with a smooth choice of words and the images you weave are dark and wonderful
lovely write daughter
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Thanks, Dad!! I appreciate your wonderful comment!!
Write on!
~*~SP~*~
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This was...DARK! Imagery and amazing words. Loved it! And love your writing style
Keep writing
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Thank you for your wonderful comment!
Write on!
~*~SP~*~
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wow, this is dark i mena this is like wow, you did a great job on this it was an amazing poem, keep it flowing my friend
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Thank you for your comment!!
Write on.
~*~SP~*~
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Hey Jess, this is kewl. I like it. Is this for Corrupt? I am just asking because of yalls comments.
DANNY
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Thanks. What? Possibly.
yall????
Are you still here in Texas?
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hey coool...completely different style...love some selected words here
keep going
Ankita
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Thank you for your kind comment, girl!!
::huggles::
Write on!
~*~SP~*~
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So do I get to put this on my frontpage? It is sure to spawn a reaction. I love this and I'm slightly jealous that I didn't write it. Now, where's a damn bow to go with my applause?
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:-O
Of course! Sorry it took so long to post it. Took me for fucking ever to get back to it, and then another eternity to find a pic I thought wold suit it.
Write on!
~*~SP~*~
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Awesome write!!! Lots of well spoken angst displayed, with intense and truly powerful imagery coursing through every line! Me - no not for me lmao!
This is damn good hun! LOVE it!
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Awww. You want me to write you another one??? I will. Because I love you!! Hope things are going well with you!!
Write on!
~*~SP~*~
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Oh I like this. maybe too much?.. naw
It's brilliant.
Be Well
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Thanks for you awesome possum comment. Hope everything is well with you, too. How did you find this so fast???
Write on!
~*~SP~* -
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Popped up on New By Favorites of course.
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